John
I jot down what I need for the flat. Once I was certain that the grocery list was complete, I sat back, took a sip of my coffee and stared out the window. Autumn in London was truly one of my favorites.
It was also Sofia's favorite.
I sigh at the thought of Sofia.
When I moved here, as expected, our communication schedule got disrupted. Initially, it was because of the move. And then, our pattern changed because of the timezone overlap, we could communicate via text messages. Still, those were still different from sitting down and chatting, our focus solely on each other.
When she wakes up, I would just be falling asleep. I tried to stay awake but after a long day of work, I often fell asleep before her alarm sounded, so we gave up chatting at night my time/morning hers. When I get up, it would be past lunch time in Manila, so she would most likely be in meetings already and we couldn't chat then either. If she was free, we couldn't speak long because she was still at work. Night time in Manila, either she was still stuck in traffic or rendering overtime and lunch break my time would be over before she could settle down to talk.
Before we knew it, there were numerous miscommunications and fighting was our norm.
After six months of this, it was Sofia who said, "This isn't working."
I was silent.
"Tell me, John." She insisted.
"You're not breaking up with me over a video call," was the first thing out of my mouth. Then, I decided to be honest. "I want us to work, Sofia, but I don't know how."
"I want us to work, too. AND I want us to be together emotionally and physically. I don't think I can do a long distance relationship anymore, John."
But, I can't move back. I had another four years in my contract and I couldn't afford to break that. "You know I'm tied here."
So, it was goodbye.
My phone rang, taking me out of my reverie. "Hi! I'm done with my alone time. I think I want to see your cute face now. Could you meet me at the park? I'm here at my favorite bench."
I got up quickly and headed to where I would pick her up. As soon as I caught sight of her still gazing happily at the changing colors of the leaves, and the children running around the park, I sigh again.
Autumn still is Sofia's favorite.
I would forever be grateful that she didn't allow me to be stupid. When she sensed that I was getting hopeless with our situation and told her, "I'm sorry if I'm not doing right by you. Okay lang sa akin kung iiwan mo na ako", my beautiful Sofia booked the earliest flight to London and slapped me.
"Stop trying to end us. Don't you get it yet? It's you and me forever, Dude. You'll be miserable without me. So, let me do you a favor. We're working on this. Understood? You can't move to Manila, then I'll move here."
My eyes widened. "Sofia, what if you can't find a job?"
"Then you'll have to marry me so I can stay. Patay na patay ka naman sa akin eh. And don't pretend you're not. I know you got me a ring a long time ago."
There was no use denying it. I had kept that ring for awhile and even during our toughest times, I could see myself marrying only Sofia.
I groaned. "Will you ever forgive me for being weak again?"
"Mahal kita eh. And I know that it was well meant and that you didn't want to impose a decision on me lang."
I cupped her face. "I'm so sorry, Sofia. I just didn't want you to sacrifice so much just to make us work."
"As much as I adore you, that was my decision to make. So how about next time run things by me? I'm certain we could come up with decisions better if we BOTH came up with it." She looked at me sternly. "It will take a lifetime to make it up to me, Mister."
"You'll let me?"
"Yes. Pero nasaktan ako ha? I cried," she pouted.
I leaned my forehead on hers. "How'd I get so lucky with you?"
She rolled her eyes. "Ewan ko nga din. BUT my brain and heart choose you."
Sofia finally sees me from her park bench and she beams. "There you are! I missed you."
"Hi! I missed you, too," I said, giving her a kiss. Akala mo naman ang tagal naming magkahiwalay pero wala pang two hours yun. "Are you sure it's not too cold? Baka makasama sa'yo?"
"The weather is perfect. But, I'm ready to go home."
Yes, I know, I probably don't deserve Sofia. She's much, much better than I am and so much stronger that I will ever be. But, every day, I try to be the man she deserves. And luckily, she chose me. And everyday, I show her how thankful I am that she stays and that she will always be my heart's choice.
I look at her smiling face and send a prayer of thanks again.
"Ouch!" She complained, stopping her walk.
"Why? What's wrong?"
"Your baby girl kicked me," she giggled.
I put my hand on her tummy and felt a kick. "Hi baby! Uuwi na tayo. Don't kick, Mommy na. Nasasaktan siya." After kissing her stomach, I stood straight as Sofia cupped my face.
"Thank you for being so good to me."
"Sabi mo nga, buong buhay ako dapat bumawi sa'yo."
She nodded. "Yup. Buti naman hindi mo nakalimutan."
As we walked, I said, "Sofia, you DO know that I would never choose to leave again, right? You and me. That's it. I'm going to be beside you for the rest of our lives."
She kissed me gently. "Yes. I'm very happy to let you know... you deserve me."
And we laughed all the way home.
THE END
