White Lie | Danny Amendola

Chapter 19

Here's a surprise update in honor of finishing the epilogue today! :)

** Danny's POV **

"Dola," Julian called out as he banged on my door. "Come on man! Answer the fucking door! I've been trying to call you for hours!"

I rolled my eyes and pushed myself off of the stool, leaving my Jack behind as I moved toward the door. I unlocked it and yanked it open. "What, Julian?" My jaw clenched as I looked at him.

"Don't 'what, Julian' me. Please tell me why I get a call from my girlfriend freaking out that you broke up with her best friend," Julian grumbled as he barged past me. "That is so fucked up!"

I let out a sigh as I closed the door behind him, and turned to look at him pacing in the living room. "It is what it is, Julian," I said, flatly. "Nothing more to it. Kris and I are no more."

"What the fuck do you mean 'it is what it is'? Huh? You broke Kristene's heart and my girlfriend is over there right now trying to help her," Julian argued as he rolled his eyes. "You're a real piece of shit for doing that, Danny. You don't do that!"

I moved into the living room, meeting his wild blue eyes. "Listen... I-I didn't mean to hurt her like tha-," I was cut off by Julian shaking his head and putting a hand up.

"Don't give me that bullshit, man! She's a mess right now! All because you did the exact opposite of what you two planned. You fucking broke up with her... In front of her boss! You don't do that, especially! You fucking humiliated her! I thought you loved her," Julian practically yelled, each word filled with more anger than the previous. "I thought you fucki-"

Suddenly it was like he was in my face. I shoved him away and let out a loud huff. "You don't think I love her? She's my fucking everything, Julian! I love her so goddamn much," I yelled back, then looked down at my feet and let out a sigh. "Now she's gone... I've fucked up."

"Ya think!?" He shouted, then let out a sigh, as he placed a firm hand on my shoulder. "Danny, man..." His voice was now full of concern, rather than anger.

I let out a huff as I shook my head, then pulled away from him and pulled at my hair with both hands. "I fucked up. I fucked up so fucking badly. I'm a terrible person! I broke her fucking heart... And mine in the process!" I looked back up to meet his blue eyes looking at me, full of surprise.

Before he could say anything, I continued my rant. "I've lost her, Jules! I just fucked up the best relationship that I have ever been in! I hurt the one person that I never wanted to hurt, man," I said, my entire world crumbling around me as I shook my head. I moved to the couch and crashed down onto it where I placed my elbows on my knees and put my face in my hands.

Julian sat down next to me and let out a sigh. "What really happened man? Why the fuck did you do it? You two were crazy in love... And then you just break up with her out of the blue," Julian said, trying to make sense of my words. "Man... I just... You two were perfect."

I looked up to meet his blue eyes again. "Don't I fucking know it! I-I... She left last night, after we talked about it... Agreeing that we would stay together... She'd be fired... And I'd be scratched for the first half of Sunday's game," I replied as I let out a shaky breath.

"Is that what this is about, man? You being benched for the first half? That is so fucking low," Julian spat out, his voice full of disgust. "I didn't peg you to put that in front of your love life!"

I looked up at him and shook my head. "No! No man! Of course not! I could be scratched for an entire season and not care-- as long as I had, Krissy," I told him, feeling my eyes get wetter and wetter by the minute. Did he really think I'd do that? I'd never been that person.

"Then why the fuck did you do it, man? I mean come on! Look at it from her side! What the hell kinda reason did you give her!? She's sitting at home, just like you are right now! If you think you made a mistake, you need to fix it, Dola," Julian shot at me, raising his voice again.

I shook my head. "I-I... I did it because the longer I sat here last night... I feared that she'd find something... Someone better one day... And that she'd rather have her job! One that will give her a boost to the rest of her future," I told him, yanking at my hair again. "I just thought about her... Not having a job... Possibly being short on rent... And... I couldn't let her be like that..." Tears began pulling from my eyes.

"You realize there are alternatives, right man? I mean... You two practically already live together," Julian pointed out. "You could like... Offer for her to move in... You'd be public at that point, too! You could totally live together!"

"I realize that, now," I complained. "I-I... It was eating me alive, Jules! I couldn't let her lose her dream job... I was sick to my stomach! Couldn't eat... Couldn't sleep! I felt so guilty... At the time I thought I was doing what was best for her." I was full on crying now.

Julian let out a sigh as he placed his hand on my shoulder again and squeezed. "I'm sorry, bro... I-I don't know how to help you. You've dug yourself a hole, bro," he said, sounding just as defeated as me.

I shook my head. "Why the fuck did I do it? I-I... Fuck!" I grumbled as I shook my head and looked down at the floor while beginning to cry even harder. My heart was completely shattered.

"Maybe you could talk to her at practice tomorrow, man. Or try calling her?" Julian suggested with a sigh as he pulled his legs up and sat indian style on the couch.

"She probably doesn't want to see a fuck up like me. I broke her heart," I mumbled. "She probably hates me right now, Julian."

"I'll try to get Vicki to talk to her," Julian said, at a complete loss for words.