White Lie | Danny Amendola

Chapter 24

** Danny's POV **

It was like slow motion. The ball came straight to me-- a beautiful pass from Tommy. Then it reached my arms, and I began running. The ball was in my arms one second, and slipping out the next. Before I could register what happened, there was a wave of orange running around on the field-- Celebrating.

I was stood there, looking down at the ball sitting on the 7 yard line-- dead. I dropped it. I dropped the fucking ball. Why was my life such a fucking mess? Why did I have to screw everything up? I looked up at the dark sky and let out a frustrated yell.

The black sky felt like it was crashing down on me. I was being crushed-- all the air left my lungs. We lost because of me. We aren't going to the Super Bowl because of me. Because I couldn't catch the perfect pass. A perfect pass from one of the best quarterbacks to ever play the game. I failed him... I failed the team... I failed me.

"Dola." Julian's voice shook me out of my thoughts. I looked from the dark sky to his blue eyes. "It ain't your fault," he said, like he could perfectly read what was happening in my mind.

I yanked my helmet off and shook my head. "Don't give me that shit, man! I fucked it up! It was all me! That was the perfect fucking pass," I grumbled as I looked back over at Tom, who was coming up to us, anger painted his face.

"Danny," Tom began, his blue eyes full of determination, and yes, a little anger. "Bro..."

I put my hand up, telling him to stop and shook my head. "It's my fault. I know it was the perfect pass! I'm fucking sorry," I practically yelled as I threw my helmet back on and pushed past two of my best friends. I could hear the two of them exchanging words as I stomped away from them. They were both hot on my heels.

As I made my way through the tunnel, to the locker room, Tom jogged past me, and Julian came up to me again. "What the hell is up with you, man," he asked as he put a hand on my shoulder. "Y-You never fucking act like this! Come on bro! What the hell!"

I shook my head as I yanked away from him. "You didn't fucking tell me," I snarled at him, meeting those surprised blue eyes. "How could you not tell me she fucking quit, man?" It was bothered me the entire game.

My breathing was much heavier now, and blood pumping as I fisted my hands. "You tell me before the fucking game? Why not earlier, you fucker?"

Julian squinted at me, shoving the helmet in his hand against my chest. "You're kidding, right? You're fucking kidding! You should have noticed that she hasn't been at any fucking practices! You should have noticed that she didn't make the fucking trip here! You shouldn't have fucking asked right before game time," he yelled, pushing me up against the wall. "You're an idiot if you didn't notice that until now— I-I should have to tell you! You should be the one getting off your sorry ass and be talking to her!"

I rolled my eyes and shoved him back. "You don't think I know that? You don't think I fucking regret doing what I did?" I screamed. I tore my helmet off and pushed it into his chest as I continued. "I was a fucking dumbass. But I've waited too long to do anything! I've been trying to zone her out when she wasn't even around! I'm sorry!" It came out pretty sarcastic, but I was on a roll and couldn't stop myself.

"I also never made Vicki or you go through what you're doing to fucking help me! N-Now... Just fucking leave me alone. When I get back to Boston I need to pack my shit and head back to Texas— that's where I seem to belong." I grumbled as I moved toward the locker room, not wanting to exchange another word with Julian.

I'd lost us the game, and now I got into a fight with my best friend. What a great Sunday.

"Dude! Come on," Julian called after me, his voice had much less anger in it. His hand was on my shoulder again, turning me around so I could face him. I met his eyes again, let out a huff, and shook my head.

I looked down at my feet and let out a sigh. "I fucking miss her, man," I said, defeated. "I lost the game... I've lost my girl... What's next? I lose my house? I feel like my life is a country song. I-I don't know what to do anymore. I won't have football to distract me anymore."

Julian shook his head. "Man, I know you miss her. She misses you, too! Do you know why she quit?" He asked, his blue eyes looking back at me carefully.

I took a deep breath and shook my head. How on earth would I know? I hadn't talked to her. All I knew was she didn't know if the restraining order went through... I'd asked her because I wanted to pay for everything. Whether I was with her or not... I wanted her to be safe-- I needed to know that she was safe.

"She told me she couldn't stand seeing you anymore! You broke her heart in so many pieces that even seeing you three times a week was giving her problems," he said in a stern tone. "That woman loved you... Still loves you! If she didn't she wouldn't be so fucking beat up. And you know what? I bet you she's at home right now completely shocked about you dropping that pass!"

I let out a sigh, but nodded. I knew exactly how she felt. I still got that nervous feeling in my stomach whenever she was on the field, even after we broke up. "I'm a fuck up, man," I whispered as the two of us slowly moved to the locker room.

Julian shook his head. "No man, you're just confused. You'll bounce back... Please think about talking to her before you go home for the summer," Julian said as he began to pull off his pads.

I nodded as I sat down next to him. For a second, I thought about pulling my phone out, praying to see something from Kris... But I shook my head. There was no way she'd text me.

Before I could make another move, Julian was bumping his shoulder into mine. I looked up at him and saw him holding his phone out to me. I took it and lifted it to my face...

Kris 10:47

Please don't let him do anything stupid. Last thing he needs is to hurt himself.

I perked up a bit, and looked to meet Julian's eyes. "I-Is that from her," I asked, surprised.

Julian nodded. "Yeah man, see... She still cares."

I pursed my lips and nodded slowly. I turned around, grabbed my phone from the shelf in my locker, and found Krissy's contact. The picture for her contact was a wonderful one of her smiling at me after I massaged her feet on the couch one day...

I could still remember it like it was yesterday...

"Danny," she playfully whined as she crashed down on the couch next to me. "I'm so tired and everything hurts." I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into me.

I placed a kiss on her forehead and took in her scent-- the one I could never get sick of. "Well, I could fix that... Would you like a foot massage to start with," I asked her.

She pulled away from me and looked up with wide blue eyes. "You'd do that," she asked, surprise painting her voice.

I nodded with a smile on my face. "Of course I would, Krissy. Why wouldn't I? I want you to be okay! I get pampered at work... I feel like I should help someone else with their body," I told her and shot her a small wink.

She rolled her eyes but completely pulled away. "That's fine with me... Start rubbing away," she said, putting her feet in my lap.

I playfully rolled my eyes and gave her the massage I promised, even though I had a massage of other places in my mind.

Once I was done rubbing her feet, she lifted her feet off my lap and moved to crawl toward me. "Wait! Krissy, stay right there," I told her, noticing how wonderfully the lighting lit up her face. I picked up my phone and pulled up the camera... "Okay, babe! Smile!" She began laughing as she shook her head.

I snapped the photo.

I shook myself out of my thoughts, clicked on her contact, and typed out a quick message.

Danny 10:50

Thank you. I love you

Then I shook my head as I deleted the "I love you", leaving it at a simple "thank you".