Caught

Chapter 21

LOUIS

            “I miss Harry.” Anne says.

We are leaving the hospital after Harry had to go to his group meeting.

I sort of miss him too, but this is what he needs to get help. If I lost Harry, I don’t know what I would do, he is the only thing I have in my life.

“I miss him too, but we have to let him get better.” I say, giving her a sympathetic look.

She lets out a sigh and gives me a weak smile.

I know she is hurting. I wish I could say something to make her feel better. We both feel alone together without Harry. All I keep telling myself is that he needs this, not me right now.

We pull up to Harry’s house and something is on the front of the house.

We get out of the car slowly, staring in horror.

In big, red, sloppy letters scrawled across the entire front of the house reads “WANNA-BE FAGGOTS”.

Harry’s mom drops her purse and gasps.

My head starts to feel dizzy again. Lines and colors start to blur together and I grab onto the car to keep myself from falling over.

All I can keep asking myself is how did this happen? Why did this happen?

I look over to Harry’s mom and she is weeping. She falls to her knees and I run over to the other side of the car.

I fall to the ground as well and hold her.

“I’m so sorry Anne. I didn’t mean for this to happen. I will find whoever did this and kill them.” I say, starting to sob.

She looks at me.

“Louis dear, this isn’t your fault. This isn’t Harry’s fault. This world will never learn how to accept anyone with children still like this here. I’m sorry this happened to you and my son. I wish it was different for you guys.” She says, wiping her tears.

We stand back up and she pulls me in and hugs me.

I can’t hold it on anymore. I start to bawl my eyes out. I can hardly breathe. I can’t even open my eyes. My legs go weak and she has to keep me from falling to the ground.

“Louis! Listen to me! I know this is hard, believe me, but you can’t just give up. You can’t do this. Just like Harry shouldn’t have done what he did.” She says, almost yelling.

I don’t care. I can’t stop. The tears continue to stream down my face and I start to scream.

“I want to die!” I yell.

“No you don’t. It’s not your time. Louis, everything is going to be okay. This too shall pass. You have to be strong. I know you don’t want to hear this, but it’s true. We all do.” She says.

She’s right, I don’t want to hear this. Fuck what she is saying. Fuck being strong. I should have offed myself when I had the chance. Why do I need to be here?

Harry has his mom, he has a family, and if I’m no longer around, people will forget about Harry and he can go back to his normal life. All the pain, all the heartache will be gone for me. After I die, I can just rest. I don’t know what happens after you die, but I do know that I won’t ever have to feel this pain again.

Just the thought of dying calms me down. This feeling of relief washes over me just thinking about finally being gone. It feels so good.

My arms start to tingle and I start to catch my breath.

One day it will all be over for me.

I know some would say suicide is selfish, but what’s selfish, is making someone who is unhappy, stay alive.

I look at Harry’s mom, and she is crying again. She is still holding me, but my body is numb.

She looks at me.

“Are you okay now?” She asks.

“Yes.” I manage to let out.

The feeling comes back to me and I finally let my weight fall back onto my legs.

I’m ready to go. I’m ready to leave. I’m ready to see what’s on the other side of life.

Anne let’s go of me and we walk inside. I hear her dial the phone for the police so they can figure out who did this to her house.

I walk upstairs, my eyes glazed over, my body barely moving.

I walk into Harry’s room and fall onto the bed.

My head is spinning.

I close my eyes.

My mind starts to go blank, and I fall unconscious.

Hi guys, me again! I knooow this is a really short chapter, but i wanted to update again bc I know you guys love it & I just hit 6k reads so I'm crying rn. Thank you so much. 

So when I started writing this, tbh I didn't know how I wanted to end it, but I had a dream the other night at it finally helped me figure that out. I now know how I want this to end. No spoilers (: 

I hope you guys are enjoying it still. I remeber when i had like 100 reads & I was so happy. Thank you so much to everyone who follows me and adds my story to their library and talks about it and shares it, you guys give me life. 

Don't forget to vote, leave tons of comments, message me, I can't wait to see what you guys think (: I love you all.

- RoBiA