Secrets (Zayn Malik)

Chapter 52

For those of you more into Harry fanfics, but are a little tired of the whole "bad boy" tattoo thingy, I started a new story completely separate and different from this so feel free to check that out :)

On to the story..

Zayns POV

"Ella what the actual fuck?!" I stand from the floor, and begin to pace around the living room. Surprisingly I'm not mad at the fact that she never told me, it's the fact that I didn't pay enough attention.

I can't shake the feeling that he tried to hurt her, and if I ever notice a scratch or mark on her I might just lose my god damn mind.

"Did he hurt you?" I breathe heavily, remaining calm and keep my voice low.

"What? No, why wou-"

"I warned you! I'm asking you because I warned you it's not safe. Where I work? That's not safe, along with who I work with. It's not safe!" I'm so damn frustrated on one hand, worried and freaking the fuck out on the other.

"Wait what?" Her eyes go wide, the light from outside making them a much brighter blue than usual. "You work with him?!"

Shit.

"Zayn," she stands from the carpet, backing away from me. "You work with that bastard?" She asks again, her voice shaky and wary. I can see tears welling in her eyes, but she's too stubborn to actually cry.

"Yes, but not the way you think." It's best to choose my words carefully, because I know her very well and she will take one thing and make it into something completely different.

"What am I supposed to think? What exactly is your job then?!"

It's amazing how we're capable to turn the tables so quickly, suddenly making everything about me and not how she just went behind my fucking back.

"I'm only going to tell you this, and I swear if you push more questions Ella, I'll lose it. It's in the black market."

"Didn't you already tell me that?" She asks, folding her arms over her chest.

"Not that I can remember."

I can, but it's best to pretend I don't.

"Right, and are you aware that your coworker is a disgusting ponce?" She approaches closer, raising her voice.

"Stop yelling at me." I'm not used to anyone yelling me. Usually, I'd put them in their place if they got out of hand. But this is her, she is my only exception.

"And yes I am. But that's not my job. I'm not involved with that."

It's clear she's considering my words I her head, knowing her, looking for faults in anything I've said. Strangely though, I choose this time to admire her beauty. She's close enough for me to notice the few blemishes growing under her skin, and a crooked scar on her cheek. Her eyebrows probably need to be done, and her hair brushed. But somehow, the man I am, I still find her to be the most beautiful girl I've ever seen.

"You truly are beautiful." I whisper, cupping one side of her face in my hand and rubbing my thumb over the fading scar.

"Zayn stop." She whines, leaning into my hand. "I'll drop this, no need to be a kiss ass."

"What? It's true!" I smile kindly, and I watch a smile form on her lips. "I'm just being honest."

"Now you choose to be honest?" She rolls her eyes, placing her hand on the back of mine.

"Only about what matters anyway." I shrug casually, adjusting the sleeve of my flannel slipping of my shoulder. Strands of her long black hair tickle my hand, and I push them off her shoulder, exposing a sweater I realized I've never seen.

"Why are we so messed up?" She asks, running one hand through her messy hair.

"This world is fucked up, always has been and it'll probably always be that way. I guess it's up to us to kind of go with it, join in the chaotic turmoil that is our society."

"Poetic, I love it." She giggles, and I know I'd love to hear that sound every day.

"I have my moments." I smirk confidently.

"Are we okay?" She whimpers, frowning up at me. "I mean, are we going to be okay?"

"If you're asking about the whole going behind my fucking back and seeing David? Well, did he lay one finger on you?" I know my eyes must be lit with fiery anger at the thought, but I need to be out at ease.

"Well he did grab me-" she starts to laugh when I flinch away, clenching my fists. "No, he didn't touch me Zayn. At all."

"Good, because then no. We wouldn't be okay." I pull her close to me, resting my chin on her head. "But then again, no baby, we'll never be okay."

"What do you mean?" Her warm breath fans out across my exposed chest; her lips brushing against the lipstick stain and wings inked into my chest.

"Like I said, we're just here for an allotted amount of time in this crazy world. If we're a little more confusing then the rest, then fuck them. We're different. It's you and I. Not you, me, and the whole world."

"I love you Zayn." Her voice drops to a whisper, and her grip around me tightens as she holds on to my shirt. Those simple four words will ultimately kill me in the end. Maybe out of guilt, for what I know is to come, maybe out of sincere heartbreak. Which I know i never want to feel, or ever fall in love with someone again.

I've made so many mistakes. And I'm sure falling in love with this woman was my worst.

"I love you too Ellana." I kiss her forehead, leaving my lips against her skin far too long, but I don't care.

I know time is slipping from my fingers, each moment with her flashing by. And I refuse to waste a second. I refuse to let her believe even for one second that I didn't love her.

"You stress me out Malik." She chuckles, pulling away. In all honesty, the crimson sweater she's wearing suits her so well in the darkest way.

"When your hair starts falling out, you can talk to me." I pull a strand of hair down, covering my forehead and leaning close to her face. She shoves me away, but I catch her hand; pecking a kiss against the back of it swiftly.

"Are we going to open the rest? I think we killed each others vibe." She wrinkles her nose in disgust, shaking her head.

"Hell yeah we're opening these! I paid too fucking much not to!" I laugh along with her, as she kneels back down to the carpet. "Plus when you see my gifts, I'll deserve something that rhymes with necks." I wink flirtatiously, but burst out laughing as I watch her replay my words in her head.

"Necks babe? Really?" Her laugh is contagious, making me feel completely okay with being an idiot around her.

"Oh yeah." I nod, smiling pervertedly at her before pouncing, leaning over her body.

"You're going to have to get through all of this." She runs her hand down her body, dragging down her curves.

"Nothing a simple tear in half won't fix."

She gapes at me, but before she can say anything, I silence her with my lips. Kissing with everything I have, I place my hands by her head, flat against the carpet. She entwines her fingers in my hair, pulling me closer to her. I'm not sure if we'll ever open these damn gifts now that we've started something neither of us can leave unfinished. But all I want is to revel in this moment, cherish every detail about it. And show her how much I truly love her.

It's short, and rushed, but hey, I need to take my time planning this ending! Anyway, WOW almost 1k reads... That may not seem like much but to me? I never planned for it to get more than 100 especially since I never ask for votes lol sooooo thank you that means SO much to me. I love you all with heart of my bottom ;) x- Natalie