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Stokeley
I don't know why I said that. Why did I say what I said. I know I hurt him. I really shouldn't have said that.
"Fuck," I sighed.
"Why would you say that?" Naomi asked me.
"I don't know," I shook my head. "I just got mad."
"You really have no reason to be mad. You started this whole situation. You guys should be honeymooners right now." She scolded me. "You can't just come over and make him feel bad about your mistakes. He already feels like it's his fault and he's been more than generous. He lets you over whenever and you get to see your kids. He does more than he should be doing."
"I know," I shook my head.
"I'm so tired of you saying you know but you keep doing the same shit and it's annoying." She grabbed Alaia out the high chair and took her over to the sink as she wiped the food of her face with a towel.
"I'll go get her ready so you can take her," she said as she walked away.
I followed her up the stairs but instead of going to Alaia's room I went to Jahseh's room. I walked in to find him sitting on the side of his bed looking at his phone.
"What do you want to yell at me for now?" He asked.
"Nothing I came to apologize,"I sighed.
"I'm tired of hearing you say you're sorry. You've apologized every time you see me and your actions don't match your words." He said. "I know your sorry. But do you know?"
"I do. And I really want to fix us, I want to at least try," I asked.
"Stokeley, you can't fix a broken heart," he sighed. "You can't fix the damage you've done. I love you so much and I always will, but there's no trust and there's something missing. That's why you went somewhere else to find it," he said.
"I didn't mean that." I begged. "Please Jah we have to fix it."
"I don't know how," he said honestly. "I don't know if this can be fixed. I don't know if I want to fix it."
