Bechloe - One For My Baby

Chapter VIII

"Chloe, can I speak to you for a sec?" Beca asked nervously.

It took the tiny brunette ages to muster up some courage to say those words to Chloe. It was just the beginning of lunch and it had been another very awkward day for both girls. Chloe didn't speak to Beca once more and Beca hated it. She spent the entire weekend trying to figure out what to say to Chloe and she finally felt confident enough to speak to her.

Chloe looked at Beca awkwardly before answering.

"Ah... Sure."

"Cool. Ah... Let's talk at the bleachers."

"Okay."

Chloe followed Beca to the bleachers where they sat and there was a bit of awkward silence between the two girls until Beca spoke.

"Look, Chlo, I'm gonna be honest with you. I didn't regret kissing you on that day. I actually liked it but I DO regret making you uncomfortable. I thought you wanted it since you leaned in and kissed me back but obviously not. I guess I'm just confused that's all. You said that you have feelings for me but you said that you weren't any good and that I wouldn't want you. Help me understand that because I don't know what you mean."

"Beca..." Chloe began. "You didn't make me uncomfortable. I liked our kiss. I don't regret that and you don't need to regret making me feel uncomfortable because I wasn't. I'm sorry for confusing you. It's just... I'm not what you want."

"Why? Help me understand."

"I'm just not."

"Chloe..." Beca sighed. "You are what I want. Look, I've never felt this way about anyone before and the fact that you've just come into my life and turned it upside down upsets me and I have to do something about it. I have to date you. There I said it. I never put my feelings out there like that and I hate it but this is what you've done to me and we've only known each other a week!"

Chloe managed to smile softly.

"Chloe, you're a beautiful girl on the inside and out and you've got such a big heart. I knew that from the first day I met you and I don't want you to feel like you're not good enough because you are."

"Beca..." Chloe uttered, a lump rising in her throat. "I... I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't."

"Chloe, please, tell me," Beca begged, looking at the redhead but Chloe just shook her head.

"I'm not ready to be in a relationship at the moment. I... I just don't see myself in one. I like you, Beca, I do, but I think it's best if we just stay friends."

Beca felt like her heart had been torn out of her chest. This was exactly why Beca didn't wear her heart on her sleeve - she just got hurt. She hated the feeling. She felt rejected and not good enough. She knew she was taking a big risk by telling Chloe her true feelings, especially after only knowing the girl a week but Chloe was constantly on Beca's mind, which never happened. Beca never got crushes and she certainly didn't let them get the better of her. Beca was nervous around Chloe because she wanted to impress her and be the best she could be around Chloe. Beca couldn't fully understand why she felt that way and why she couldn't control it but she couldn't fight it. She just let it happen, which she was starting to regret.

"I'm sorry that I haven't spoken to you lately," Chloe said. "I've just been trying to get my head around what happened. I still want to be friends if you do. I like you and I enjoy spending time with you and if you still want to, we can keep helping each other with Music and English."

Beca was hurting but for some reason, she couldn't find it in herself to say no. Usually, when people hurt Beca the brunette would shut them out and wouldn't have much to do with them but it was different with Chloe.