Afraid | Nikki Sixx {Remastered}

Chapter 13.

Carly's POV

A few days had come and gone, nobody will tell me what happened at the bar, I have no recollection of it, I drank more than I thought I did.

Nikki and I.. Well.. Things could be better. He's been really distant with me lately which really hurts, I don't know what's going on with him. I haven't gotten the chance to sit down and talk to him.

I walked out of the dressing room after putting the clothes rack in and immediately started to walk to their tour bus. This is really out of character for me, I don't like confrontation of any kind. But, I really like Nikki and I wanna know what's going on.

I walked into the tour bus and saw Nikki step out of the bathroom. "You and I need to talk." I said. He looked over at me.

"Oh, hey, Bambi." He said.

I walked over and grabbed his hand, I quickly went into the back part of the bus and shut the door.

"What's been going on lately? We haven't been around each other at all." I questioned.

Nikki sighed. "Carly, now really isn't a good time." He muttered.

"It's the only time, any other time you run the opposite direction from me. We need to talk about this now." I said.

He groaned loudly. "If I knew you were gonna be this clingy, I wouldn't have started this thing with you." He said.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "I'm not being clingy." I said.

"Yeah you are. You act like I'm your boyfriend and I owe you and explanation, I don't owe you shit." He spat.

Great, I guess this Nikki is back.

"You kinda do, you were all about me a few days ago and then you just like disappear on me." I said and crossed my arms over my chest.

"You really want an explanation?!" He asked, his voice raising. "I'm bored of you! I want someone new, you're boring!" He yelled.

Those words hit me hard. He's bored of me? I'm boring? I had to fight back tears before replying.

"How am I boring??" I asked.

"You're too innocent! You hardly get drunk, you don't do any drugs, you never wanna go out! You're. Boring!" He yelled. "And you won't give me a blowjob." He mumbled.

I gasped. "Really? Is that the main reason? That I won't suck your dick?!" I exclaimed. "You've never done anything for me, either! You haven't gone down on me, why should I go down on you?!" I added on.

"I do all of the work when we have sex, you just lay there and make weird moaning sounds!" He yelled.

I feel utterly humiliated. I show him my body, I have sex with him and now he's throwing it back in my face? Making fun of the way I moan?

"God, you're an asshole." I said quietly.

"Well, you're a prude." He shrugged and went to walk out the door.

Something inside of me snapped. I walked over to slammed the door shut again, I whipped around and stared him directly in the eye.

"Have you ever thought that maybe I don't wanna suck your dick because I don't know where the hell it's been? Why the hell do you think I make you wear a condom? I'm on birth control, you don't need to wear one, I just don't want any diseases your dick has on it." I said angrily.

His jaw clenched. "You're a fucken bitch." He spat.

"Well, you're a junkie." I said, matching his tone.

He shoved me away from him, I stumbled and fell onto the floor, my head banging against the wall. I gasped and looked up at him. I felt tears fill my eyes, that really hurt. But, what hurt even more is that Nikki just walked out of the room. He gave me one last dirty look and then walked out.

He didn't apologize, he didn't help me up, he just walked away from me. The hot tears streamed down my face. I held my head as I got up. I looked at my hand. At least there's no blood.

I quickly ran off the tour bus and onto my bus. I knew I had a good reason to be afraid of him, he's horrible. He hurt me, I wish I could hate him but, I don't. I hate myself for letting my walls down for him, because now I'm romantically involved.

I climbed in my bunk and pulled my covers over me. My head started pounding and I pulled the blanket over my head as I silently cried, alone. I'm pathetic. I shouldn't have even gone to his hotel room that one night because now I'm wrapped around his finger. He probably planned this all along. I'm not special, I'm boring. Just like he said.

(A/N: Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed! Please vote, it's greatly appreciated! Feedback is always welcome & encouraged! Okay bye🧸)