dialogue

socially aware

lily: i miss being friends

josh: we are friends

lily: are we tho? you never talk to me anymore or text me

josh: i didn't text you one day

lily: ik maybe that im just overreacting about, but like do you still like me?

josh: yeah

lily: you know it's usually customary if you like someone and that someone likes you back for the two of you to date or atleast like spend more time than usual together ... see if you didn't like me i would get that why you would stop bc maybe you just said you like me bc no one has ever felt that way towards you and while it hurts it's understandable

josh: no lily, i like you

lily: okay then wth are you gonna do about it

josh: i have do things about it

lily: if you're gonna keep me around yeah or we can just stop whatever the hell this is bc honestly it's exhausting and i hate feeling these feelings bc i feel like im the only one putting into this friendship if i had a switch off button of my feelings and expectations then fuck yeah i would turn it off but i can't and i have my own problems and school shit to worry about and all i can think about is you and how awful it feels that you're not thinking about me

josh: i didn't know you felt that way

lily: well now you do

josh: i'm sorry if that's how i made you feel that way

lily: sure sure you are, i can't hate you and that's what makes me want to hate you

josh: why would you wanna hate me?

lily: you are so aggravating you know that, you spent so many nights complaining about wanting a gf and being lonely and no one talks to you but im here right at this moment right here right now yet you ditch me for your "friends" you walk away like i'm not entertaining enough im not disposable you get that, i'm not here to entertain you if anything you should entertain me bc i've been the one working to salvage this itty bitty piece of crap you call a friendship bc i have stuck with you through thick and thin and i can't say you have done the same for me

josh: lily..

lily: what, oh god you're not. this is not my fault don't cry

josh: you're right

lily: i know im right, stop crying i still give a shit about you and i'm not gonna walk out on you bc i know how that feels

josh: oh, lily, i am so sorry

lily: i just i need some space

josh: no you've had enough space, what you need is for me to be a good friend bc that's what you've been to me

lily: well, i've gotten used to being without one..

josh: i deserve that

lily: fuck yeah you do, im being harsh i know.... but it's cause i care okay josh i wanted you and needed you and you were the only one for the job and i get this nothingness from you and it hurts y'know it's not something i can overlook or shrug off

josh: see this is why i have no friends

lily: i'm your friend, you fucker

josh: but not for long

lily: no not for long, forever you're stuck with me

josh: i'm gonna be a better friend, i promise, i'll change, see it's like a bad chain bc i have no friends i don't know how to be one

lily: that's a load of crap, i didnt have friends and then i got faye and then i got more friends

josh: but you're not a geek

lily: eh, i'm not exactly the picture of cool either, you just need to be more socially aware