How To Kill Love

Chapter 1- Pilot

Unknown year
In the middle of  nowhere
"Not sure if I'm still a virgin"

Nausea, headache, migraines
More migraines
"Where the hell am I?"
"Who am I?"

"Is it weird to not know who you are

but know your name?"

Being in the middle of nowhere is something that doesn't happen every day. Being yourself and thinking you're a stranger to yourself is as rare even. This is definitely a weird dream and I'm definitely, probably, stuck in a parallel universe, the cosmos even. Who knows.

Truth be told, I know my name is Elly Foster, but being in this random area in the desert is quite surprising. Being in bloody clothes is even a more surprising matter. Why am I lost in a desert while in bloody clothes?

From the looks of it, I am in a desert with a convenience store a few feet away and cacti blocking the sun's rays. My eyes widened even more as I saw a woman standing in front of a store, signaling me to go to where she's currently standing. Does she know me and can she explain what's going on? Her hands flapped higher and her voice seemed soft like a mother. No one in my life has ever seemed this kind, and maybe that's because I don't remember.

Do the people in the convenience store know me? Who knows.

I thought to myself, "why aren't I thirsty or having a hard time walking?" I was literally under the sun on a desert.

I then looked at the view around me and ran towards the convenience store with the name, "Chucks Terf." It's crazy how the woman standing next to the store's entrance acted as if it were normal to see someone stranded on a random occasion. Her facial expression didn't seem surprised of my presence. What if I actually work in that store and lied down under the sun then lost my entire memory?

I didn't even need to say anything for the woman in the counter to check on me. She smiled and handed me a bottle of water as I chugged the sterilized liquid to moisten my dry throat. The woman then gave a stare of fear, sorriness and hope. She then spoke with a deep voice, it was as if she just drank a bottle of tequila. "I saw a truck earlier with people in masks. They dropped you off like some dead body to dispose. I thought you were dead, so I didn't look, but look who is staring at me now, an alive person. I was just frightened that maybe I'll be next if they saw me help you. I'm grateful and pleased that you came by. What happened and why did they leave you stranded?"

"I don't remember anything like seriously. I don't know who I am nor those people who dropped me off here in the middle of nowhere. I don't get why I was under the sun with sand on my cheeks. I don't know what's going on." I replied and got myself spooked out by the little pep talk. Is she serious right now, this moment? I was left stranded while not knowing who I am?

"Oh dear. I'll bring you back to the city. Maybe the truck had kidnappers who abducted you or they pranked you. Maybe you were traumatized to the point that you nearly died then forgot your memory." She gulped in fear once again,  "I'll bring you to the hospital." My eyes closed and the last words I heard exclaimed gibberish in my head, "Hello?! Wake up!"

Then the light flickered in front of me as darkness surrounded the view. I closed my eyes and it seemed like I was trapped, but I don't know where or when.

***
3 months ago

***

Every day is just like every other day, except it's not.

I am a student with a dream, a dream to publish a book and own a restaurant. It's silly but it's in the silly dreams that inspire us the most. That's why I decided to have a summer job before college, so that I'll have experience in the real world. Every break time in the job is special because I get to hang out with my favorite co-worker, Harry. We talk about the random things. We sometimes laugh a lot that we lose our breathes then there are those times we smile to comfort ourselves with the emotional backstabbing experiences we share.

I smiled lightly as I closed the far gap between me and Harry. I moved closer with a grin, knowing I'm about to speak about something deeper than I could imagine. We are having one of those emotional backstabbing experiences sharing times. Today can't get any more interesting.

"Some people ask me what it feels like to love. Not just loving your family or friends, but loving someone romantically. Love is a feeling I don't understand accurately, but some think I know it greater than them. Some think I'm an expert when it comes to love. It's a feeling I can't decipher yet I keep going back to find answers. It's also something I've never felt in a long time.

Love is rare. It's beautiful and chaos at the same time, and it's something we all think of differently. Some of us think love is sweet and nice. Some of us think love is only giving heartbreaks than any good. Most of us think love is caring and basically being the other half of someone. For me, love has its depths that needs to be experienced than being read from the books.

Someone once told me you should hear love advices from the single ones out there. Even if they never experienced love, they branch out the different sides of love unlike the taken ones. The taken ones often focus on the good side of love and its seemingly perfect story. The heartbroken ones focus on the pain, not the beauty that comes with it. The single ones don't consider love painful nor perfect, but imperfectly perfect for they saw love rather than felt it. The point here is that love has its different parts and one side is never the whole thing.

Although love has many references and plot twists, it's priceless. The way you feel is unstoppable to the point that your mind will always try to find him or her on any occasion. At times, you just think of him or her before you sleep and smile if ever you just chatted with him or her that day. Your mind will even hide his or her flaws and accept him or her like some perfect human being just for you.

Honestly, whoever you are thinking about now is probably someone you love. Don't try to stop it or deny because feelings become bigger once stopped. Just accept that fact that he or she is your type for there is nothing to be ashamed of.
You can't choose the person you love and it is sometimes unexpected, so it's not your fault or is it?

Anyway, I'd rather not talk more about love because like what I said, I'm not an expert,
Harry."

This is my perspective about love as shared to my co-worker Harith. We call him Harry for short.

"But some people say you are an expert though. What if you're secretly an expert?" Harry replied with eyes as shocked as a startled cat. I've never been this emotional to someone face-to-face in a workplace.

I answered with a sigh. "Oh, I only loved one person in my life. I think one experience will not suffice that I am an expert. Although, that one experience made me publish a poetry book called, "Uneven Love." I also found myself in one experience that it changed me."

"Maybe all you needed was one experience to be an expert. Maybe it summed up love as a whole with its sides." He replied with a shy smile and a pat on the back.

"I really don't know as of now, Harry. Although, I guess I can share my one experience in love. It's of course a little long, but it's worthwhile." I replied.

"Sure thing! I'd love to hear this intriguing story."