Peter's POV
Patrolling sucks. The bruises, cramps, broken bones, you name it! I mean, I don't regret the spider biting me. Well, actually... I kinda do. But still, I would have never had such an amazing family of Avengers if I had never been bitten by that radioactive spider.
But patrolling still sucks, and it sucks, even more, when you have to deal with weird shit! Just today I was helping a group of tourists get to the nearest train station when I heard a homeless man wailing, "Accept yourself! Love yourself! Accept yourself!"
Like, what the fuck dude.
It scared the fucking shit out of me. The dude was even dancing! With a rubber chicken! And there were signs everywhere telling me to 'Love and Accept myself' or 'Respect my body'; instead of loving my soul, I think my damn soul flew out of me!
What nonsense. I couldn't really do anything about it, and everyone was just staring at the homeless dude, they were even taking videos of him. I bet it's going to get famous on Vine.
The dude was coming closer to me while dancing. I was terrified. He looked at me and started screaming, "Do you love yourself, Spider-dude?" I just died.
I was hesitating and looking around for help, a hero, looking around for help. This day couldn't get any better. I just said, "Uh, yeah?" I think I was asking him the question.
He just gave a wonky smile before going back to his signs and starting his satan ritual again.
*Plays Illuminati theme song on iPhone* If things couldn't get any mysterious...
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Avengers One-shots | CRACK-FIC | MARVEL AU ✔
Fanfiction[COMPLETED] [PETER PARKER CENTRIC] In which a bored Marvel fan decides to turn on her computer and write some fanfiction, including her favourite characters. (づ◔ ͜ʖ◔)づ Hi, I'm Bob, and I get paid by this author to give you all time skips. [ON-THE-G...
