Always and Forever

2. The guilt

                 WORD COUNT : 612

Asusual I woke up to the alarm sound that was ringing off my ear . Today was my day off as it is saturday ,so I decided to visit the nearby war camp. getting out of bed was the most diffucult task that I am facing everyday, that too on your day off .. do I have to tell you more😅 . But I convinced myself and woke up with some new found energy or you can call it a spiritual energy . Because it takes a lot more than just energy to wake up from your peaceful sleep on a day off.

Today I choose a blue denim with a turquoise color kurti matched with a blue hijab. I just hate to put on make up,
Don't conclude something before you know the real reason, I'm just too lazy and that's it .so after getting ready I just went down and greeted my brother Rafan and his wife Aaliya with salam and looked for Romaisa, my one  year old cute little niece.she was sleeping peacefully with a smile on her lips which made me wonder, what dream was she having ??

As I was wearing my shoes(because it's a war camp). Rafan was forcing me to have my breakfast. I now know that I can't leave the house without having my breakfast .. so without denying I ate my breakfast in silence with a glass of juice. After conveying my salams I left for the camp.

Before entering the camp I have to make myself strong and convince my stupid heart again and again not to break down there , coz you know it makes the affected person more weaker.
When I was in indulged in such deep thoughts , I reached the camp...
As I reached there the wailings and cryings engulfed me reminding me to stay strong. I noticed people who have lost their legs, hands, few even lost their eyesight , Which made me shiver.

As I was helping an old man with his bandage , a little boy was came by my side crying, I lifted him and gave him some candies that I always carry with me in my bag , he was crying so much that tears were just flowing effortlessly.  the scene itself was too much to bear.As I consoled him ,I asked him what happened ,though I  guessed what may have occurred.. he had lost his family in the terrorist attack that took place last night while they were sleeping . He was sobbing while recalling the disaster that took place , he recalled how his mom hid him under a table and gave her own life in front of his eyes.

I just felt like taking him home and to give him all the love that he is missing now , but we see hundreds of children like him daily, it doesn't make it fair or less painful, but the truth is we can't afford it all, so I took him to the nearby orphanage ... I turned back quickly unable to see the pain and loneliness in his little brown eyes which were tired of crying.....

I returned back to home with a burden , a guilty feeling that can't be described. This happens each time I go to the war camp... coz I know how it feels to lose your parents overnight , you feel devastated and lonely. But my brother was with me during that phase of my life which made it a bit lighter . But nothing can be compared to the loss of your parents..

I went to bed quicker than usual, I don't know whether it is because of the tiredness of the body or the soul, which was too much for me to bear ...

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Okay now don't forget that star, which is looking for your attention😁
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