Because I love you || Jungkook

The graveyard

I place my phone on the nightstand and drift off to sleep. When I wake up, I find myself surrounded by the dim light of dawn. The clock reads five o'clock in the morning. I turn over, attempting to fall back asleep, but after a few futile minutes, I surrender. It's now half-past five, and I decide to get up and take a shower. After freshening up, I have breakfast, finishing around six o'clock. With two and a half hours before school, I decide to clear my mind. Grabbing my key, I step outside, closing the door softly behind me. I start walking, a fifteen-minute journey to school. The city is quiet and seemingly deserted at this early hour, almost like a different place. The sun rises, casting a beautiful pink glow across the sky.

Upon arrival, I find the gate already open. I make my way to the cemetery and stand before my parents' grave. This is my refuge when I feel overwhelmed and need someone to talk to. I miss them tremendously. They are gone, and the reality hits hard—I can never hold them or apologize for my unwarranted anger. My mother will never comfort me again after a heartbreak. They are gone, and I must live without them. My eyes well up, but the love for them resides eternally in my heart.

I sit in front of their grave, absorbing the silence. The urge to cry diminishes as the quietude envelops me. A portion of the burden on my shoulders lifts. After some time, I stand up and head to school. The sun has fully risen, and the city is bustling with life. People head to work, children are dropped off at school, and I stroll leisurely, taking my time. The later I arrive, the shorter the time I spend at school, and the less I have to face Jungkook, Mulan, and her friends.

Upon reaching school, I go to my locker to retrieve my books. On my way to math class, I spot BTS, but Jungkook is not among them. A momentary relief washes over me, but it fades quickly as I notice Jungkook and Mulan trailing behind BTS. I want to turn around, but before I can, "Hey sis, feeling better?" Jungkook looks up. "Yeah," I reply with a smile. Mulan shoots me a hostile look. Jungkook smiles at me, but I don't reciprocate. I lower my gaze and walk past them. Why did I do that? Now he probably thinks he did something wrong.

Seated in my math class, I attempt to focus, but my thoughts keep wandering. Why can't I move past this? Why is it tearing me apart inside?