Like Nobody's Business

Hard Truths

Nayeli Binns

White flashes.

That was after the first and only hit to my face, he didn't want to leave any bruises that I wouldn't be able to explain. I was frail and my voice was indistinct. The discomfort between my legs was growing more and more by the second and all I can think about is getting away from him. He made it as clear as day that he would murder me if I told anyone, even if he never said that to me I don't think I have the courage to tell anyone about the way he stole my innocence.

I was hoping that I could've shared that special and intimate moment with Alexander. Now sex is the last thing on my mind. I can't focus. No matter what I'm doing, at some point, I drift off thinking of all the other horrible things that could've happened that night. I could be dead. I miss feeling normal, I miss sleeping good at nights and I miss the feeling I usually got when I was around Alexander. Nowadays I rather be alone.

It's been three days.

Three days since I've ate.

Three days since I've slept.

Three days since I did anything.

I stared at my apartment ceiling with my phone at my ear waiting to talk to my mother, this has been my routine for the past three days. I feel slightly better after reading my results earlier, I made sure to get tested for any STDs. Anthony could've had something but thankfully he didn't.

"Hey mommy, how are you?" I tried to sound as happy as my emotions would let me.

"I'm doing fine baby, how's work?"

"Work is very busy," I sighed, not because of how busy I claimed to be but because I'm lying.

"Why are you lying? Alexander stopped by here yesterday and he told me he hasn't seen you in three days and he thinks it's because you're staying here with me and you told him that he can't come near you because you're sick." The concern was vefy evident in her voice, I should've known better than to try hiding something from my mother. "I need to know what is really up with you, you told me you were working baby, you must have a very good reason to lie to me."

I thought about what I should do but I just couldn't bring myself to say it. Not over the phone at least.

"Is Alexander there?" I asked hoping she didn't expose me.

"No he left and he still thinks you're sick," I released a breath I never realized I was holding in.

"Mommy I need to tell you something," I blurted now crying uncontrollably.

"Baby what's wrong?"

"Something happened, something bad. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Nayeli what happened? Slow down you are talking way too fast."

Before I could even say a next word I was startled by the sound of something falling to the floor, it sounded as if it was coming from the living room. I jumped off the bed worried because I am the only one here, that's what I thought at least.

"Mom, I'll see you later I promise I'll stop by today," I whispered and dried my tears. I didn't wait for her to respond before I ended the call.

I checked every room in the house but it was empty, however, in the living room one of the pictures that hung on the wall had fell off and crash to the floor. I was just being paranoid.

I knew I had to go to the hospital to speak with my mother, I really don't want to but I can't keep hiding from everyone. My heart was pounding against my chest, the rhythm was synchronized with my fingers as they tapped on the door of the taxi. My eyes never drifted away from the driver, I specifically requested a female driver out of the fear I had that a male would harm me. I felt my phone vibrating in my hand and Alexander's name popped up on the screen I took one more look at the driver before answering.