"i'd rather fight with you than be in love with anyone else." credits go to @thebreakfastclub, i just changed it a bit.
S E A N
__________
"sean, you never have time anymore. you're always busy with work or you have to edit a video." she complained, while i was editing a new video.
"i'm sorry, kaycee. but i have to get these video uploaded before tuesday." i apologized, my eyes still locked to the screen.
"you never pay any attention to me. it's starting to feel one-sided." kaycee sighed, rubbing her face with her palms.
"i'm trying to make everyone happy." i remarked, my voice sounding tired.
"everyone but me?" she snapped back, her patience finally leaving.
"i'm trying my best here, kaycee. don't be like that." i told her.
"don't be like what? an angry girlfriend because i think i have the right to be if my own boyfriend won't even acknowledge me." kaycee scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest, her eyes squinted slightly into a glare.
"can't you see i'm busy? we can talk after." i rolled my eyes, shaking my head in disapproval.
"for once in your life pay attention to me." kaycee pleaded, grabbing my arm. i shrug her off.
"get off of me." i barked at her.
"sean, this hurts." she whispered.
"what hurts?" my voice softening at the crack of her voice.
"this," she motioned between us, "it's hurting me. this relationship is tearing me apart, I'm not happy in this relationship. i wonder, and i wish it never even crossed my mind, if i should leave." she cries softly, i feel the atmosphere change, the tension growing thicker. i could hear my own heartbeat beating out of my chest, i knew i shouldn't feel like this, sad and angry, it was selfish. i caused this, it was my fault, i had gotten so caught up with work that i forgot about who i needed to focus on.
"why don't you?" i regretted the words that came out of my mouth the second they left them.
"what?" she whispered, taken aback from my answer.
"this isn't a healthy relationship, i'm not a good boyfriend. so, just, leave."
i reasoned with her.
"why wo-would you say that?" she hiccuped, her eyes filled with tears.
"why don't you just leave?" i asked her.
"because, sean..." she started, "because i love you and i'd rather stay here and fight with you then be loved by anyone else."
i let her words register in my brain and i swear i could feel my heart crack. "kayc, i'm sorry." i let my head fall down in shame. "I love you. I love you, I'll try to be better. I'll try to be the better for you, I'll try. I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."
"it's okay. we're gonna be fine. it's just you and me." she caressed my cheek.
"just you and me." i whispered, holding her head to my chest.
✰
this is actually so bad.
i am so mad i had a finished a one shot i had trouble working on for so long and it got deleted.
so here this is.
thanks for reading.
also, I've never had this bad of writer's block and un-motivation to write, I honestly think I've made it worst by not putting in any effort to try to write and get that motivation.
I've now realized how untalented I am. this is horrible, I'll try to write something better lmao, thanks for reading :)
