The History Class

The Bunker

     We had to be lost.  We had been walking for hours and not yet seen any Crab People or classmates.  I knew we shouldn't have left Ralph, he knew this island better than anyone.  Rules are rules however, and until Ralph beats Bobby's ass, I am still Bobby's girl.

     "The sun is almost down!"  Pablo said, a hint of fear in his voice.  The sky was much darker now, with only an hour so left of sunlight.  However, the sunset was paired with a very bright pink line of clouds, coming off from the north side of the island.  "What the fuck are we gonna do?"

     "We need to make camp."  Sam said, finally speaking up and breaking his day long silence.  I looked over at his handsome face and couldn't help but goggle at his hotness.  Bobby noticed and pushed Sam to the ground.  "Back OFF Dick Sandwich!"  

    Bobby started flossing above him aggressively.  "I am in CHARGE!  THIS IS MY BITCH!"  

     "Okay chill, we still need to make a plan."  They all looked at me.  "You've been here longest girlie."

    "I don't know the island that well."  I nervously looked down ashamed.  I gave Sam a hand but let him fall as soon as he gave me any weight.  "YOU RESPECT MY BOYFRIEND BITCH!"  

     SMACK!  I smacked the ginger so hard his red cheeks got even redder.  I looked over at Bobby, who was so heated and impressed.  He picked me up and ran into the woods to find a place for lovemaking.  The jungle was very dark now though, and only moments passed before we bumped into a solid concrete wall.  

     "What the fuck?"  Bobby asked.  "Looks like some kind of building.."

     Bobby pulled me up into a passionate make out session.  I broke away for breath, my vision shaky from the intensity.  "Guess it's our lucky day."

     My legs were wrapped tight around him and he carried me around the corner looking for an entrance.  We felt a door with out hands and to our surprise it was unlatched.  We walked in with ease, still tongue wrestling.  I felt my back gently hit the wall and more force as he pushed in and pinned me tighter.  The heat from our bodies rose and we melted into one another.  I felt the buckle of Bobbys pants unlatch and my body shook with anticipation. 

     "Y'all are nasty!"  Tanner yelled.  He was standing in the corner, along with several of our other classmates.  It looked like they were making some kind of trap.  Several of them weaved bark together to form a wall of trees around a suspicious looking hole.  Before I could ask, Ralph crawled up from the hole, covered in dirt.

     "How could you do this to me?"  Ralph said from directly behind us, tears streaming down and cleaning lines on his cheeks.  "Why you breaka my heart?"  

    "Ralph..."  I looked at him, my heart in panic.  At the disco.  "I just have to-"

    "Get out of here bro.  Rules are rules now she's my hoe."  Bobby smacked my butt and I angrily turned around, standing on my tippy toes to look into his eyes.  His mouth hung open as his confusion kicked in.  "Bae?"

     I PUNCHED HIM DEAD IN HIS EYE!  "WHO YOU CALLIN' BITCH?"

     His body dropped like a bag of potates and I jumped on top of him, slamming him with my elbow right in the stomach.  He coughed and before I could swing again a pair of warm hands grabbed my wrist.  "No, Baby."