Love has a rule. There is only a certain amount of hearts one can carry in their own hands without causing any damage to any of them. And that number is one.
When Lara Dias meets her idol, little did she know that when she went home that day, she al...
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Shawn's POV: The breakup happened nearly four months ago, but I can't seem to get over it. At all.
The first month was especially hard. I was constantly immersed in my heartbreak, and my anger. Anger, because she picked him over me. After all this time of me doubting her, and then of her insisting and insisting that she didn't have feelings for him, kissing him, and me giving in and forgiving her, she still picked him at the end of the day. People were still all talking about Infinity War, and so I was constantly being reminded of that bastard. And plunging into a repeated dwelling, thinking, doubting, trying to understand what he had that I didn't. On that first month, although everyone somehow already knew about the breakup, I never opened up about it, neither to the press or to my close friends and family.
In the second month, I thought of myself over it. I thought I had finally let go, and focused on looking forward and moving on. But with that, whenever my family asked about the breakup, I opened up. And that's when everyone made me realize how wrong of me it was to ask her to choose. Guilt started to consume me little by little, imagining how terrible I'd feel if every time I was out with a female friend, Lara had thrown a hissy fit. How terrible I'd feel if she was hostile to a model I filmed a video with, when I was simply doing my job, and was glad that I got along with my co-worker.
How terrible I'd feel if she made me choose between her and, let's say, Brian or Ian.
The guilt made me want to reach out, to apologize, ask her to give me another chance. But then I'd seen how happy she seemed to be in Portugal, on holidays with Tom and Harrison. I screwed up, and I should move on, and let her be happy.
But then, it was like she seemed to follow me everywhere. I saw her everywhere. If she wasn't everywhere figuratively speaking, she was literally. Because with everyday closer to the premiere of her movie and the hype around it so high, I could barely bend a corner on the streets and not find myself facing her, looking heroic and powerful on a huge movie poster. And I couldn't go online without coming across a video of her in an interview, her fanbase multiplying like crazy. More and more people were getting to know who Lara Dias is, and falling in love with her smile, her talent, her charm.
I'm tired of not managing to move on. But the truth is that I still love her. I think I will only have peace of mind if I try at least one more time. I have to at least try.
With a surge of courage, I sit up from the bed in my hotel room and reach for my phone. As I wait for the search to complete, I hope and hope that the premiere is soon. And if not, that I'd find out that she's in LA.
Please be in LA.
It finally loads, and tomorrow's date pops on my screen. The LA premiere of her movie is tomorrow.
I hesitate. Maybe I'm being selfish. Tomorrow it is a big date for her, and her ex showing up at her door is not the most comfortable of situations. What if she has moved on and is already dating somebody else? And I go there just when they are there, together?
