Lovely (K.n.j + K.s.j)

17

Jin

He opened his eyes to a sleeping Namjoon, holding him close, looking so peaceful as he slept. Jin ruffled his hair, feeling the soft locks in between his fingers. Their conversation last night played in his mind.

Did Namjoon really confess to what he found? Jin didn't say it verbally that he found his files, but in his heart, he felt like Namjoon was telling the truth.

Today. Today Jin was going to talk to Namjoon. He didn't have work, not did Namjoon. Whenever it was a Saturday, the two always promised to take the weekends off for the two to relax.

He escaped Namjoons arms and sat on the edge of the bed. Head in his hands. He doesn't want to believe it, no matter how much evidence is given, he doesn't want to believe that his boyfriend was some sort of Mafia Boss. Jin felt the bed move, meaning Namjoon was waking up.

"Jin?" Namjoon's deep morning voice was heard, Jin turned around and smiled sadly towards Namjoon. "Yes, Joonie?"

"What's wrong?"

Jin took a deep breath, looking at Namjoon in the eyes, his lips  formed a frown.

"We need to talk."

That's what they did. Namjoon was seated on the sofa, while Jin stood, the file behind his back. Quietly, Namjoon prayed that Jin would talk to him, he didn't to feel this guilt anymore, he wanted to come clean. He didn't want to marry Jin knowing he kept this secret for so long.

"So...what did you want to talk about Jinnie?" Namjoon's hands were sweating. Jin takes another deep breath.

"Please, don't lie to me." His voice was stern.

He took the file and slid it towards Namjoon. He took it in his hands and flipped through it.

"Is this true Namjoon.." Jin felt tears form in his eyes.

"Jin-"

"Is this FUCKING true, Namjoon?!" Jin felt his heart racing. His hands curled up into fists as he looked into his boyfriend's eyes.

"Please, if this is true, I need to know. Fuck, Namjoon don't lie to me." The tears didn't stop. Namjoon's eyes widened. He stood up and held onto his boyfriend. Jin held onto Namjoon's shoulders, his nails digging into his skin.

"Don't tell me it's true Namjoon, don't tell me it's true."

"I'm sorry.."

Jin cried harder, screaming and yelling at Namjoon. He kept moving around trying to pry away from his hold,  but Namjoon kept his grip on Jin, not wanting to let him go.

"It's not true! It's not true!"

"It is, I'm sorry.."

"Why did you lie to me! Why didn't you tell me?!" Jin was screaming at Namjoon as he kept his nails on Namjoon's shoulders, Namjoon not reacting as the nails kept going deeper and deeper, probably leaving marks or blood later.

"I gave myself to you! You said no lies!"

"Jin, please I'm sorry." Jin looked up at Namjoon, eyes red and his face wet with tears. Namjoon felt his own tears fall down. He thought it would make him come clean, but he thinks that it made their relationship go down hill now.

"Goddammit Namjoon, what am I going to do?! Put you in jail?! God! Why didn't you tell me in the first place?"

Jin shouted and shouted at Namjoon, their connection so thin now that Namjoon felt so far away. He kept quiet though, waited for Jin to stop talking as he kept holding him tighter. Jin kept hitting him and crying as he did so.

"Did you leave the file out on purpose?"

"Yes.."

"Why?!"

"Because I wanted to come clean!" Jin stayed silent.

"Clean? What the hell do you mean 'clean' your company and so many others affiliated with you, killed and robbed so many people and businesses, and you want to come 'clean'!?!"

"I didn't want to lie to you anymore Jin! That's why I left it out for you! I didn't want to live under a lie while I was with you!" Namjoon held onto Jin's arms? Gently, but he still looked him in the eyes, tears down his face. His eyes and nose just as red as Jin's.

"I didn't want you to find out, that's true, but I felt that I loved you too much to keep hat secret from you. Couples should tell everything together, and I've kept this from you for so long-"

He felt a sharp pain on his cheek as his words were cut off,  "I wish you never told me." Jin looked at him, anger and sadness etched in his face. This wasn't the face of his boyfriend, Jin, anymore. This was the face of Korea's best Detective. Detective Kim Seokjin.

"If you don't want me to catch you and put you behind bars, take whatever is yours and go." Jin pushed him roughly, but in his heart he knew he didn't mean to. "I will not hesitate to take out my gun on you Kim Namjoon."

Namjoon's eyes showed heartbreak and betrayal. He wanted to come clean but he didn't want it to end up like this.

Jin wiped his eyes and grabbed his keys and wallet.
"If you aren't gone in an hour, I will arrest you Namjoon." And with that, he left.

Namjoon stood still in the middle of the room. Tears welled in his eyes as they poured and poured onto the floor.

His heart was racing and he felt like he wanted to scream. But he didn't.

Namjoon wipes his tears away, went to their room and took his suitcase, calling Jimin as he did.

"Jimin..."

"Boss? What's wrong with your voice? Are you okay?"

"Why do you care?"

"Yah, what happened." Jimin's voice sounded frustrated but Namjoon couldn't care less.

"Nothing. It's code TOKYO, Jimin. I'm leaving the country again."

"What the fuck? We didn't agree on anything! What do you mean leave the country? What will I do-"

"You'll take care of the library as usual, it will be under Got7's care until I come back. I'll still keep in contact with you-"

"And what about you? Where will you go huh!" Jimin shouted through the phone.

"Somewhere where Jin won't have his heart broken again."

"You fucking idiot, Kim Namjoon."
Jimin ended the call.

Namjoon took his belongings, leaving a few shirts and jackets that Jin loved to wear just for him. He took all of the books and plushies that Jin gave him and looked at the half empty apartment. The bookshelf was so empty without Namjoon's collection.

The closet looked so dull with Jin's uniforms. And the bed had a dent on where both of them slept.

Namjoon wrote his final goodbye to Jin, and without turning back, he walked out of the door, leaving the keys on the table.

"Goodbye." He said to no one as he boarded the plane.
He said nothing during the ride, Jackson looking back and forth between the window and his best friend. Namjoon's eyes held a blank stare as he drank his bourbon. But Jackson knew better than to question it.

"Goodbye..."