Chockolate Peanut Butter Cake

Chapter 22: Drinking Those Feelings

Tomura sat at the kitchen table with a glass in his hand. It might've been eight in the morning but he sure as hell needed that drink. He was already on his third glass kind of missing the old bar they were in. It was blessing in disguise at that time.

He was thankful that Dabi was still asleep on the couch and Kurogiri was at their base. At this point he didn't even know why they had the base anymore. Izuku had offered to get a bigger apartment so they had more room but Shigaraki shut him down like they were only there temporarily. His hero boyfriend would've got a fucking house for them without having a second thought but he didn't want that either.

He placed his elbows on the table with his hands on his head. The very thought of leaving had been on his mind since six days ago when they had that serious conversation about him being jealous. Tomura didn't want to hurt Izuku at all. The idea of telling the hero to his face that he didn't want to be with him was enough to make him sick to his stomach.

What a fucking mess. I don't know how it ended up like this. I do.... All because I thought I was being a smart ass by getting that cake.

The Villain to Civilian Act was heavy on his mind now. Himiko and Jin would definitely want to be civilians now with a baby on the way. Dabi probably wanted it now too since he managed to connect with his little brother Shouto. The League of Villains is almost gone. Who knew what Kurogiri thinking with everything. The almost five years they all had together was coming to an end.

Thanks to his inability to tell Izuku no.

This is not what I wanted. What the fuck did I want anyways? Everything that we worked for was for nothing.

He ran his hands through his hair for the umpteenth time and downed the next glass. He picked up the bottle and started chugging trying to drink away the sour feelings and uneasiness he felt.

Wasn't supposed to be like this.

Shigaraki thought about that lovable, chubby face. The big green puppy dog eyes that always sparkled when he talked. That wild mossy green hair that was soft like silk. Those freckled cheeks that made him look so innocent. Those lips....those lips that do the dirtiest pleasurable things they do.

His face was flushed now. Never in his life had he thought he'd be gay. Tomura liked women, found them sexy. Hell, he even thought Himiko was pretty hot when she came along but Twice had bonded with her first after he saved her life. Now he was head over heels for a fucking All Might loving hero.

Fuck.

This is what he got for messing around. Trying to have fun. It was hilarious when Izuku got flustered but then he suddenly got comfortable with Tomura's whole existence. The whole turning point for them was when Bakugou came to the door and revealed the hero's deepest darkest secret. That's where they fucked up. They should've left.

Should've exposed him to the world but they didn't

Each one of them felt some kind of pity for him. They each knew how he felt because they each were him at one point in their life. The struggles he had behind closed doors. He was the embodiment of everything they struggled for and wanted.

"Man, it's been a while since you day drank."

Tomura jumped. Dabi was sitting up on the couch scratching his chest.

"Can I join you?"

"Need more alcohol."

"Be right back."

Dabi sent a text and a warp opened up. He was back after fifteen minutes. He placed eight bottles onto the table then a carton of orange juice. Shigaraki arched an eyebrow at him.