Where Are You Now?

Flawless

Chapter 24

I honestly don't know how long it has been like this all I know is that it's a long time.

"Then what happened?" She asks sitting on a chair next to my bed. "I don't remember." I lie but remember every second of it. "She needs to talk it through. It has been two weeks with no improvement at all." I hear my therapist telling my mother once she gets out of the room.

"Is she ready to go back to school yet?" I hear my father asking her. "Till we realize what actually happened, she shouldn't go out." I hear her telling them. And I close my eyes knowing that it has been their goal all the time; to know what happened.

"They don't really care about you; they are just curious about what happened to you." I tell myself staring at my arm that only gets worse day by day.

"Michelle, I'll see you again tomorrow." My therapist says packing her stuff and taking her paper notes.

"Can I go to school tomorrow?" I ask her and she freezes. "I want my life back. I'm over what happened. Honestly, I'm bored here." I lie hoping she'd agree while the truth is my nightmares are like a sweet poison that is killing me every night and I want to escape them.

"If that's what you want okay." She says with a small smile on her face. "But I will still have to see you daily." She tells me and I nod without bothering to force a smile.

"It only started an hour ago. Do you want me to drop you there now? " My father suggests standing at the door .

"Now?" I ask surprised looking back and forth between the therapist and him." This way you would avoid making an entrance." He says smiling and I smile at his attempt of trying to change the mood.

I get out of bed after they leave the room; take a shower and put on black pants with a black sweater that perfectly covers my stitched arm along with a black and white vans.

I straighten my hair which still looks bad but it's better than how it was half an hour ago.

Colorless is how I feel; if my life was ever colorful, right now it's only black. Not white and grey, black. As I look so pale and soulless.

I rush downstairs once I finish knowing that after a few minutes I'm probably going to see him. How, where and when? I don't know. All that I know is I'm just going to ignore him for the sake of what's left of me.

"Your dad is waiting for you outside." My mother tells me and I nod.

I leave the house taking a deep breath and get in the car. "If anything bothers you, you could just call me and I will pick you up." He says starting the car. "Okay." I say wondering why he's home anyway but I'm glad that he is.

He stops the car in front the school's building and I smile at the way my heart starts skipping beats. "I'll also pick you up." He tells me. "Okay." I say leaving the car.

I haven't said that much to them or anyone else ever since what happened but John. He was the only one who didn't talk to me about it. He seemed the only one who actually cared about me more than about what happened to me.

I enter the school to find the corridors crowded and the first person that I see is him. He is with George, Austin and others that I haven't recognized.

He's standing against one of the lockers looking so perfect and flawless with his deep blue eyes looking at the boy in front of him and listening to whatever is being said and just nodding then a small smile appears on his face which soon fades once his eyes meet mine.

And that's when I realize that I am staring at him while everyone else is staring at me and whispering.

I ignore the whispers and keep on walking up to my locker through the crowded corridor without harming my arm. I pass them by and I could feel his eyes on me but he doesn't say or do anything as if he doesn't know me. I don't know what I've expected but I somehow feel disappointed.

I reach my locker successfully without hurting my arm and I unlock it taking out Biology and English knowing that it's what we have next.

"Long time no see." I hear someone saying and I turn to find Chloe.

"Yeah." I say looking at the ground and I just want to yell at her for not being there while I needed a friend.

"Are you okay?" She asks looking at me. "No." I say looking away from her so that she wouldn't notice me crying. "Want to get out of here? There is no soccer training today." She says looking at me and I nod in agreement.

I decide to put my books back in the locker before I follow her since I can barely hold anything.

We sit on one of the seats and stay silent for a few seconds. "I... I'm sorry. I really tried to contact you but they didn't allow me not even by calling you." She says breaking the silent. "It's okay." I say smiling weakly. "So, do you want to talk about it?" She says and I nod. Chloe is the only person that I still trust and I honestly don't know if I could ever trust him again.

"So tell me." She says interrupting me from my thoughts. "I was going to school and um..." I end up telling her everything I've told my therapist and the police once I realize that she doesn't know anything too and I would never let her in any of this. Ever.

"So they just wanted money?" She asks shocked. "Yeah ... just money." I lie.

The bell rings after a few seconds of silence and luckily I have an English class with her. We both rush inside and I go to bring our books from the lockers once again. And luckily the corridor isn't that crowded anymore.

Chloe leads the way and I follow, passing Josh by. He's standing with Zack next to the lockers and they both stop and stare once we pass by but luckily Chloe didn't notice them. I open my locker once I reach it and take out my English book and carry it in the unstitched hand since I can barely move it.

I turn around to find where Chloe is and out of nowhere someone crashes into me and keeps on walking. The crash wasn't that strong but I drop the books on the ground from the pain that I could feel in my arm now. I try to bare the pain pretending as it doesn't exist and pick up my books with my other arm.

"Are you okay?" I hear someone saying and I look up to see Josh.

My breathing becomes faster as he's right next to me and I miss him, I miss seeing him, I miss hearing his voice, I miss looking him in the eye, I miss the way he frowns, and the way he looks at me.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I lie trying to take hold of my books. "Come on. You're coming with me." He says as it's an order burning what's left of me with his deep blue eyes. "I'm not going anywhere with you." I tell him and right now the corridor is almost empty. There is only Zack , us and a few others. And Chloe is nowhere to be found.

"Please." He begs looking down at me. "Okay." I agree following him. God, I miss him.