Whatever I Am, I'm Yours.

chapter forty-nine

NOT PROOFREAD

Camila

"You sure you don't got a twin?" Dinah asked me as they stopped right in front of my house. It was late and all of use just wanted to get home and get out of our practice clothes. Dinah's car was bound to smell like sweat and dirt after she dropped everyone off.

Monday. Days have passed since I've spoken to my girlfriend and honestly I've felt quite sick thinking about her. Mostly because all I could imagine was Catalina all over her.

The entire ride back Normani tried vouching for Lauren, Dinah kept asking if I actually knew if I had any relation to Catalina, and Ariana was mad telling me about how could my girlfriend even allow that.

It's been like this since the weekend. So you could imagine how disinterested I've grown to their words.

"I don't," I sighed as I opened the door on my side and waved to my friends, "I'll see you guys at school tomorrow." My voice not giving off any sign of my mood. Just dull and monotone as I stepped out of the car and made my way to my front door.

"Mila," I turned to see them all looking at me with worry in their eyes, "We're here if you need us." Normani said while I just nodded.

I didn't really have the energy in myself to give the smile I wanted when I heard those kind words, but my lips did curve up weakly while I waved them off and grabbed my keys to open the door. Walking in I was met with the smell of my mother's cooking. I was surprised to even see my mother cooking since it was an eight o'clock, but I knew why once I saw my father and brother sitting at the table.

"Mila," Harry smiled as he got up and stopped once he saw what I was wearing, "Oh wow..." He smirked while his eyes landed on our father who didn't seem happy about my clothes.

"Papi," I started while sighing and pointing up stairs, "The sprinklers may have turned on at some point during practice. That's why I look like a swap monster. I'll clean them myself later." I said with a roll of my eyes and made my way to my room upstairs.

Finally in the the comfort of my own room, I peeled off my yellow light weight hoodie and let it fall on the ground near my bed. Also stripping out of my running shorts before I let myself fall on my bed. I was simply trying my best to not cry over what happened. It's been hard to not cry over what happened in the weekend.

I was being a bitch.

I know I was, but I couldn't stand to see Catalina all over my girl.

Tears started to well up in my eyes as I couldn't get the picture of them together out of my head. It didn't help when Ariana showed me how Catalina posted a video of them meeting at the shoot on her instagram story. I mean seriously?! Why'd she have to hug her like that?!

Only I could do that.

Looks like she's found someone else.

No she hasn't. I tried shutting out my thoughts as I shut my eyes tightly, Lauren wouldn't do that.

You were scared of her going to California. Scared that she might find someone else. And looks like she found a better you.

I'm me. No one else is me. Lauren loves me.

She seemed pretty happy with Catalina there. They stuck together through the whole shoot.

Because I was ignoring her.

Or maybe she realized she was better off with Catalina.

"No," I shook my head as I sat up and started to strip myself from my tight white cami top, "Fuck I can't breathe." I gasped as I peeled it off and my head started to feel light. Walking over to my closet I noticed Lauren's The 1975 sweatshirt hanging there. Without even realizing that I'd reached for it, I started to put it on and felt my body start to calm, but I couldn't catch my breath.