Taking slow, deep breaths, I peered down at the pattern that had been engraved deep into the skin of my wrist, so deep that it was a piece of my DNA. It was painful for me to admit but it was beautiful, a tiny set of piano keys that descended into a...
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Chapter 9 - Just another day in the Lee Household
"I swear you do this just to annoy me, Cole!" I yelled, crossing my arms over my chest in attempt to look somewhat stern - I definitely didn't. My precious pot of strawberry yogurt, sat in the clutches of my evil little brother as he shoved it's creamy contents down his greedy throat so that I couldn't take it from him. There was a mischievous glint in his dark eyes which I could see clear as day, even if he was giving me a completely innocent look that said otherwise.
"I don't know what you're talking about big sis." Cole spoke with a mouthful of my yogurt. I scoffed and rolled my eyes, ready to march over to him and shove the now empty pot of yogurt down his oesophagus. A violent streak, I get it from my mother. Just as I was about to assault Cole, dad walked through the front door, arms full of shopping bags and sporting a sweaty forehead. Things had been okay between us since that dreadful day and I was grateful for that. My dad was my rock and I hated those couple of hours when we weren't exactly on speaking terms.
"Hello my wonderful children, I hope nobody was violently murdered while I was out," Dad began cheerfully, dropping all of his bags onto the floor and walking away from them. It was then that he noticed Cole had my yogurt, an amused smile spreading across his tanned face. "Ah, I see that somebody will be very soon though. You do it just to make her mad Cole."
Cole simply shrugged before tossing the bright coloured pot into the trash can next to the sink, sticking his tongue out at my childishly before retreating back to the territory of his room. It took all the kindness I had left to not bash his skull in. It's sibling love, I think anyways.
"What's with all the bags?" I asked dad as I pulled a box of granola from the cupboard I'd just opened after inspecting it's content and deciding which part of it would satisfy me the most. It was the granola I used to eat everyday whilst I was in high school, convinced that it would get me good grades, a replacement for the lack of studying I did. Not going to lie, it was really gross but after years of eating it, I'd grown fond of the bitter flavour the nuts gave and the distinct taste of coconut that the flakes gave off. Dad raised his eyebrow at me and shook his head, pulling a couple of the bags onto the counter in front of him.
"Did you forget that you start college next week? I figured that my bank account would've been drained by now but you've not spent a dime on anything since you bought that sweater you're always wearing! What kind of father would I be if I didn't go out and get you something decent yet comfortable for you to wear whilst making the foundations for your future?" Dad hummed as he pulled out multiple items of clothing that were questionable in my eyes but it was the thought that counted. A couple of shirts that he bought caught my eye but it was the dresses he produced out of the red bags that made me choke on my bitter granola, eyes wide in shock.
The material was sheer, meant to stick to the curves that I barely possessed. In all the books i've ever read, the father's wouldn't let their daughters out of their room in such an item, never mind buy it for them. There was barely anything to them, large sections of them cut out with intentions of making a woman look provocative. It wasn't my style at all and I would never wear it but it clear that my dad had a hidden motive behind buying me such revealing clothing.
"It's been 2 months Sophie, you need to get out there and at least try to move on from him. If he really cared about you he'd have tried to be here but he hasn't and I know how that feels, how it feels to have someone you care about so much throw you to the side as if you mean nothing to them. Unlike me, you still have time to pick yourself back up and show him that you don't need him to feel self worth. There's only a week left in this little town, go and live to the fullest while you can. Don't let Yoo-" Dad said softly whilst holding my cheeks before I cut him off, moving away from his touch as soon as he began to say his name, the name of the person that made my feel the lowest.
"I appreciate the gesture dad but no, i'm not ready for anything like that yet, i'm sorry." I brushed him off softly, turning away so that he wouldn't see the tears building up in my eyes as they did every time I heard his name. It had become a rule in the house that no one mentioned him to me as it turned me into a puddle of sadness and self pity.
Not once had he tried to contact me or see me since we'd last talked, since he'd been outed for who he really was. I didn't know what i'd expected after that message he'd sent me 2 months ago, not knowing how to interpret it. Did it mean that he was going to wait for me to make the first move? Or did it mean that he was just waiting for the best time to reconnect with me? The first month without contact dragged on, each day seeming to go on forever but now everything seems to be going back to normal, each day becoming easier to cope with.
"It will only get harder to ignore Sophie, the pain I mean. Trust me honey, I've lived with it ever since your mother left and it's not pretty. Just let yourself have time to heal. A bandaid will not fix a bullet hole." Dad said sympathetically, kissing the top of my head before going into the back garden to water his plants. He was right, always is, but I just didn't know how to move on. This was the first time i'd ever been hurt in such a way before and I was too timid to put myself out there and gain control of my life. I was all too aware of my high school friends and the exciting lives they were already leading whilst i was stuck in bed reading until I passed out.
It was then when I decided to text an old friend of mine, one i'd been extremely close with up until the end of high school where we'd gone our separate ways due to wanting different things. There'd been nothing between us, we were just very different people but didn't notice it until then.
Sophie Hey Joonie, you doing anything tonight?
Namjoon Wow, sophie! I haven't heard from you in months and I'm going out tonight with some friends, why what's up?
Sophie I know I've been MIA recently but do you mind if I tag along? I need to let my hair down and have fun :)
Namjoon As if I would ever mind! We're going to the 'Daydream' tonight, want me to pick you up at 8 tonight? Your house is right on my route anyways.
Sophie I can't wait, see you then!
After placing my phone down, I smiled to myself and squealed loudly, not caring if anyone thought I was crazy. This was going to be the night of finally be able to just let go and be myseld, my mind not plagued by continuous thoughts of a boy that didn't care about me the way I did him. The dresses on the counter were calling my name, drawing me in by a irresistible force that I just couldn't say no to. After grabbing one of the skimpy items, I rushed upstairs to begin making myself look presentable enough for the place i'd be spending the night at.
