Spidey Dreams: A Tale of Spiders and Barbies

No More Spidey?

Tom walks onto the set of Avengers: Endgame, ready for another stupid ass day of filming and shit, when suddenly he's flagged down by one of his managers. He runs over to them.

"What's up?" Tom asks.

"We have some not so great news to discuss with you, sit down, Tom." His manager says.

"Did I do something wrong?" Tom asks.

"No, no, you didn't do anything. It's about the fate of the Spider-Man franchise. Well, uh.....Sony and Marvel had a bit of a falling out and they're no longer in partnership."

Tom is shocked and distraught.

"I...I don't understand. What does this mean?" He asks.

"I'm afraid Spider-Man might be kicked out of the MCU at this point."

"What?!" Tom stands up. He is in flurry of anger and heartbreak. So many kids love him as Spider-Man, so many teenage girls fantasize about Peter Parker giving them the D. How could this happen?

"There is somebody who's trying to reach an agreement with the two companies. They want to make a phone call with you if it's possible."

"Why me? I'm not in charge of these companies, I just play the character."

"....He says he knows you personally, but he didn't say who he is."

Tom stares confused at his manager, who hands him his iPhone. The number is already brought up, but he doesn't recognize it. He hits the call button and puts the phone up to his ear, pacing as it rings. Someone picks up, but doesn't answer.

"H-hello?" Tom says, nervous.

"Hello back at ya, sister..."

Tom almost drops the phone, his eyes bug out of his head.

"No......James?!"

"That's right, the one and only."

"Fucking hell! Somebody, make it make sense! America, explain!!!" Tom shouts towards the ceiling of the large film set while shaking his fists, making his costars in the far back stare at him. Toms face goes red with fiery.

"Oh shut up, that's no professional way to act when working out business." James says through the phone.

"How the fuck are you in on all of this? Why won't you just leave me alone?!" Tom asks.

"I sister want you, Tom. I didn't like the news I heard recently. It killed me inside, but then I realized when you have money, you can just buy love."

"James, I don't want to be with you!"

"Shut up and listen hot stuff, I can take over this deal and keep it going as long as your contract goes, but only on one condition. You break up with your double cheeked up thot and bring that ring on over to moi."

"And what happens if I don't? Are you really gonna end one of the greatest superhero's ever created?"

"Oh good, you're already one step ahead of the game, smarty pants!" James says.

"Please say sike right now." Tom says, pinching the bridge of his nose in dismay. He feels like he's in a hopeless nightmare.

"I could but I don't want to haha. Tell you what though, I will give you 24 hours to think about it. And if you don't report back at all, it's bye bye Spidey. Tee hee heeeee."

"Stan Lee didn't die for this!" Tom shouts.

"I literally don't know who that is so he's probably irrelevant. Anywho, see ya sister!" James hangs up.