Learning to Love Him Again

Chapter 20: Chaotic Silence

I would like to thank God and all readers for all the love given to this story! :)

Hi everyone, I would like to say that I got a lot of requests from readers to come back and give an update, so I decided to give an update on a chapter I had written recently. However, my next update will be in 3 weeks because I want to get ahead in writing the chapters on this story, so I can give weekly updates peacefully without being crunched on typing out a chapter in time for a weekly update.

I got a lot of questions on why I went on hold and I did put this story on hold because I felt really demotivated as I felt that I was not able to creatively justify this story because I was working really hard on writing the chapter all day and I was not getting too much feedback and the readership dropped. So, I decided to put this story on hold and give myself time in writing the chapters and really expressing myself creatively. During this time, I got a lot of motivation and encouragement from all of you readers and I was told to write for myself and not for the idea of satisfying others. I learned also that I should write for myself and so I have decided to write this story for myself and the way I would justify Shivika. Moreover, I was told I have a large base of silent readers, so I realized that there are plenty of people reading my story and there is a whole of base of fans for this story, so I want to thank all of you :) Also, I do not want to disappoint all loyal readers by leaving this story midway, so that is why I will not give up on this story and will work hard to give it a happy ending :)

I would not say too much, but if you like this chapter then if you wish please do give feedback :) Also, if possible please do spread the word about this story and if you already did then thank you :) I may update Chapter 21 tomorrow (heavily flashback based mainly on Shivika) depending on how much time I have and if I get good feedback :) Thank you for reading :)

P.S. I really put my heart into this chapter especially the last scene at the end between Shivika. I hope you like this chapter, but we will see :)

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Flashback:

A large smile appeared across my face as I twirled around in the maroon color saree before fixing it on my shoulder. I ran my hands through my long brunette hair as I quickly put on the small diamond earrings Shivaay had gifted me.

"Anika! We are getting late!" I heard him yell from downstairs as I rolled my eyes at his impatience.

We were going out for dinner with his close friends tonight and for once I had decided to dress up more nicely. Shivaay always tends to taunt me over my clothes and how underdressed I tend to be.

It does hurt. I do so much for him and somehow he still tends to weigh me against beauty standards a wife should seemingly obey and not the fact of how much I fulfill my duties as a wife by dedicating my whole day to caring for him and making sure he is at comfort. Indeed, I am not fulfilling the duties of feminism, but somewhere I feel I need to because if I don't I might just lose him. Shivaay has so many expectations and somewhere I feel the need to fulfill them because in a way it would validate my love right? So I want to believe, but somewhere cannot.

I ignored the thought as I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled once more. It's been a long time since he has complimented me. I bit my lip nervously as I wrapped the end of the saree around my waist tightly.

"Anika! Hurry up please!" His footsteps nearing as I smiled shyly and turned quickly on my heel.

There he was standing in the doorway looking dashing in a charcoal colored suit. He seems to be getting attractive every single day and I am proud to say he is mine.