Learning to Love Him Again

Chapter 30 Part 1 of 2: Sindoor

Hi everyone :) I want to thank God for giving me the courage to write and thank all you amazing, wonderful readers who continue to read this story :)

Thank you for reading :)

Please do not forget to read Chapter 30 Part 2 available after this :)

Please do read Chapter 31 that is now available as well :)

Author's Note: I will say that I do not condone the actions that Shivaay is taking and portraying in this chapter and the actions he will take in the future chapters. What I am show Shivaay as is purely due to storyline and dramatic purposes only and none of this should ever be done by anyone to anyone else.

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Friendly note: Twitter Account name: Iridescentlove4 made this amazing video based on this story all on her own by putting in a lot of hard work and using my favorite song with amazing Shivika scenes! She deserves a lot of appreciation from all of you because the scenes in the video are on par with the storyline and it is as if the story has come to life, so please please watch the video and appreciate her because she deserves it! :)

https://twitter.com/Iridescentlove4/status/1206086937800523776?s=20

If you are not able to click the link then please do go on my Twitter account called JasmineDarcie to click the link for the video as I retweeted the video :) Thank you :)

Author's Note: This chapter has long monologues for Shivaay and Anika which were necessary to understand their thought process and allow them to emotionally connect with the readers. The next two updates will have less of these, but these monologues are essential to understand their thought process. Thank you for understanding :)

Thank you for reading :)

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Shivaay's Point of View

Tracing my hands against the wall, I looked towards the small wooden brown box in front of me that laid in the closet. A box in which I had kept all my memories...memories of a past in which for once I had found peace before I ruined it with my own sins.

Closing my eyes shut, I felt a tear slip down my cheek as a bitter sense of pain and angst erupted inside of me. An unfulfilled desire igniting inside of me as I felt the touch of her soul that I kept hidden within inside of me.

All my life, I have only witnessed greed, selfishness, rage...love was something that was known about, but never felt or touched until...you came Anika...You ignited a hallow piece of me that no one else dared to touch or come close by. Without fearing that you might get broken by my salvaging desires, you took a step towards me and you continued to mend me despite the fact that I didn't want to be mended. You brought me close to feeling love before I threw you out of my life, but damn...when I lost you was when I began to love you...

Why did I commit such a sin by betraying you Anika? You didn't deserve this from me considering how selfless you were in loving me. My breath trembled as I clasped my hands against my mouth wanting to scream, but failing to do so as the barriers I hold still don't want me to break down.