Save Me (Kim Namjoon X Readers)

Chapter 19

Commander Jeon found it strange that the couple was walking feet apart from each other. It didn't occur to him that it was even possible considering how they had been inseparable yesterday. The air was also quiet, which normally he would enjoy, but right now he found it uncomfortable.

Namjoon was helping the guards load supplies for the upcoming journey. He focused all of his energy on lugging heavy loads, yet his heart and mind wanted to float to you instead. The words he spoke had greatly affected you. He saw it in the way you would space out, your smile nowhere in sight, and tear streaks on your cheeks. It was for your own good, he thought.

You tried making yourself useful by carrying the only things you could and staying out of the way. After getting over his initial annoyance, Commander Jeon instructed you to accompany Lady Park and to keep her entertained. There was a certain tenderness in the way he spoke her name that caught you off guard. He wasn't even like that with the Empress. Hesitantly, you glanced over at Namjoon, who seemed to be doing fine. He should, considering he obviously never wants to see you again after getting the curse lift. So you headed towards Lady Park, who resided under the gazebo nearby. Even though he was still in sight, your chest felt tight and oxygen was struggling to flow in.

Unlike many other ladies in the court, she was by herself. "Good morning, you must be Lady Song." she said brightly, eyes disappearing behind her smile yet you found that it was forced. Not necessarily for you, but for the world.

"Commander Jeon sent me so that you wouldn't feel alone." you told her. She offered the seat across from her as she poured the tea.

"Oh," she blushed, "Is that right?" The smile on her face right now was real. At that point you had a clear idea of the situation at hand. How pitiful they are, unable to be together because she will wed the Lord of a prestigious house as her duty. Up until a few days ago, you wouldn't have questioned it. Now you're not so sure, surely love must mean something. "You understand, right?"

"My apologies, I didn't mean to intrude." you said.

"Nonsense," she shook her head. "You must know what it means, being a lady yourself. We wed for the sake of our families and we have to be happy with that. I should be grateful that Her Majesty has blessed me, the plainest daughter of the Minister of Treasury, a marriage with one of the great generals."

"Please don't talk ill of yourself, you are beautiful. Though I do understand and I am so sorry that you cannot be with the one you love most."

She smiled softly and shook tilted her head, "It seems that we might be in a similar situation."

"What do you mean?" you frowned.

"You keep looking at him." she pointed out.You realized although you were talking to Lady Park, your eyes naturally found him in the crowd. He was conversing with Commander Jeon, they're finally getting along.

"It's not what you think." you told her. She shrugged.
"Sometimes you don't know it until it's too late. I hope you won't make that mistake."

His hands went up to clutch his heart and you instinctively stood up, knocking the tea cup over. The content spilled over the table and the cup shattered on the ground. The sound caused the men to look over in your directions. His eyes were the ones you wanted to look at, but when he did, you blushed and crouched down. "Oh my gosh, I am so sorry, my Lady." you said frantically.

"No, it is okay. Please don't pick up the pieces." she urged.

You didn't listen, you felt too embarrassed to have caused such a scene in the first place. As fate would have it, a piece pierced your skin, and droplets of blood began to slowly ooze out. Before you could try to wipe it away on your hanbok, someone already grabbed your hand, firmly, he was not about to let go.

"How could you be so clumsy?" he yelled quietly. It was the way your grandma used to scold you, harsh yet full of love.

"I-I'm okay." As you tried pulling back from him, he held your hand tighter. He ripped a short section of cloth from his attire and wrapped it around your finger. The minor wound didn't require that much care but still, you let him do it. "Thank you."

"Be careful next time. Whatever harm you put on yourself, I feel it too." he said, a sudden annoyance in his voice. That was when your smile dropped.

"Oh, I see. I'll try to be more careful next time so that it doesn't affect you. Excuse me." you said quietly. Then proceeded to excuse yourself from Lady Park and went off somewhere else. At that point, the guards had returned to their routine. Only Commander Jeon was looking your way, afraid you might hurt his beloved, not that he would ever admit it to you or to himself.

Namjoon stood in silence as he watched you walk away, in his mind, he's kicking himself for being so purposely rude. He only wanted you to be careful, it pains him to see your hurt, and that's without the curse.

"Don't blame yourself too much, men can never come to terms with reality." Lady Park said, sipping her tea contently. She eyed Commander Jeon, who's eyes widened like a lost deer and turned away.

"I do not know what reality is anymore." Namjoon answered quietly.

"Well, pushing her away is not the answer. It'll hurt you more, and it'll hurt her the most." She placed the cup down gently and traced the rim of it with her finger. "She'll yearn for you, even when the world is against her."

"I appreciate your words, my Lady. However, I don't believe Lady Song will ever desire me."
Lady Park hummed. "Like I've said, men are stupid."