Falling [SOLBY ONESHOTS]

Lost

WARNING(s): implicit sexual content,

Summary:

the ache of loving Samuel Golbach.

Word Count: 1,907

You met him when you were young, fresh out of middle school, and you learned the color of his eyes beneath the high afternoon sun as his saxophone played loudly in your ears. You tried to focus on your fingers sliding across the clarinet buttons, but that saxophone was so loud. He spoke to you beneath the sycamore trees as you wait on the curb for your parents to pick you up, listening to his voice telling you about the blonde girl you had been crushing on as well, and it felt like poetry.

But, you found that you couldn't take your eyes away from his. They were so blue; they were like the ocean. You fell so deep within them.

The next morning, you woke up with them painted on the back of your eyelids and you knew that you had drowned.

He called you some days later and you were not sure how he got your number, but you did not care. He wanted to meet and you found that the abandoned jewelry factory down the road was your haven. You saved his number in your phone under the name: MyOneAndOnly.

Years later, you fumble through the dark of some abandoned California building and found his eyes had darkened and that he was not the boy you knew him as. Those ocean eyes were wet and he was screaming about something grabbing him. You reached out and touched him for the first time since you first met. He was all you remembered with his slim body shifting under your fingertips and you could hear someone begging for more from the back of your head. Your sapphire eyes found his ocean blue in the dark and they brightened and he softened.

Then the years fell away and he scared the hell out of you, as he always did, when he decides to dance with the Devil at 3 a.m. Despite your warnings, he continues to play, casting long shadows on his pink wall. You hated yourself and him, but you mostly hated yourself for loving him the most during these times. No amount of witchcraft, which drippled from your lips like liquor, like sage igniting in your palms, was going to save him or you.

But, one day, the looks he only gave you, when he thought you were not looking, disappeared and he brought his girlfriend in to meet the Trap House. You did not like her. She was all brunette with candy red lips and a voice like an angel. She clearly had a few names tattooed on the inside of her thighs from lovers that never came to be more. A more sensible side of you wanted to warn her that he would only do worse to her than break her heart; that he would fall in love with this girl and never let her go. You wanted to tell her that she didn't need another name on the inside of her thigh. But, you more than just disliked her.

You hated her for she gave him everything you couldn't.

And when the months rolled by and he showed no signs of ditching the brunette with blue highlights and running away with you to some distant abandoned building, you drove away from the Trap House and met a man with a smile that ran for days. He was sweet and kind and intelligent and funny and a body that you didn't mind brushing up against yours, but Brennan Taylor wasn't him.

He was not Samuel Golbach.

So, a year later, you walked into your apartment with your heart shattered on your merch scattered across the floor and a bunch of silver rings dangled from your fingers. You discovered that the blonde man had ditched the brunette girl and, before the moment, he had found you on the rooftop of your apartment complex, a safe haven for you.

You were sitting on the edge of the building, twirling your silver wolf ring around on your finger, when he suddenly pulled you in and brushed his lips against yours.