Hypnotised by drums (TW fanfic - Book 2/4)

Part One

Nathan's POV

As I sit on the sofa with Renee and Lucy, I can't help but remember what brought us here. I still feel guilty about what happened, every single day and I will never forgive myself for putting Renee through what I did. Lucy is just a blessing and she's like our poppy. After everything bad that happened she is the one pure thing, like after the war, poppies would grow. I hate what I did, but I wouldn't change it, because if it didn't happen, then we might not be here now, more in love than ever before.

As I stroke the scars on Renee's wrists I have to look away through the guilt. Her wrists used to be so perfect and now their covered in scars. Just like her, she used to be innocent, but now she has to have a barrior around her at all times. I know she still doesn't trust me and I don't blame her, after everything I did, I'm lucky to even have this second chance. We've been together for five years now and I haven't cheated once in that period, but she still can't trust me.

"Daddy, I drew this for you?" Lucy says, as she holds out a piece of paper. I take it off of her with a smile and as I look at it, I realise that she's drawn me, Renee and herself. She's standing in the middle with us on either side, holding hands with her.

"That's amazing, Lucy" I smile, as I plant a kiss on her forehead. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me, and even if me and Renee break up again, I know that I will never let my daughter down.

"Yeah it's great" Renee agree's with me as she gets up off of the sofa and takes the picture off of me. She takes it into the kitchen and puts it on the front of the fridge with the rest of Lucy's art work. All of them are pictures of the three of us.　The happy family.

"I'm going out with the girls tonight, Nathan" she tells me.

"Oh right. Who's going?" I ask her.

"Just me and Maria" she smiles.

"Oh is Claire not going with you?" I ask her, curiously. Claire is Siva's wife, they're so cute together and Maria is with Tom.

"No" she says and then she rushes off upstairs to get ready. I trust her and everything, but we never go out together anymore. I mean, when we were together for the first time, I made the stupid mistake of cheating on her with Rheanna and so we didn't really spend that much time together and then when we got back together, Lucy was already two, so we didn't really have much time to our selves. Sure we go out. I go out with the lads and she goes out with the girls, but never together though and I miss that.

It's not long before Renee comes running back down the stairs, all made up and ready to go out. She always looks amazing when she goes out, but it's just sad that we never go out together anymore, so it's not for me. I sometimes get paranoid that maybe she's cheating on me to get revenge for everything I put her through, but I know she loves me and she wouldn't do that, just like I would never do it to her again. She means too much to me, to risk losing her twice.

"So I'll be back at about twelve" she says, before kissing me.

"Yeah alright then. Have fun" I tell her and she smiles as she rushes over to Lucy to say goodbye.

"Bye mummy" Lucy says in her sweet and innocent tone.

"Bye baby" Renee says back and within seconds she's out of the door and climbing into a taxi, where Maria is already waiting.

I turn to look at Lucy who is sitting watching the TV. I sit down next to her, knowing that I will have to send her to bed in about twenty minuets. I wish I could just spend all my time with her, she is such a great kid, and she's mine.

At that moment my mobile starts to ring. I look down at the caller ID to see who it is, but it's an unknown number. Who would be ringing me from an unkown number? I have everyones numbers that I talk to.

"Hello?" I ask down the phone, curiously.

"Nathan, It's Rheanna" she sobs. What does she want? It's been five years since I last saw, since she lied to me. She broke my heart. She made me believe that her son Leo, was mine, but then I found out that she'd lied to me for years. I don't even want to talk to her. I'm just about to hang up, when she starts to talk again.

"I know you probably hate me after what I did, but please. I need your help" she tells me and I can hear the fear in her voice.