Hypnotised by drums (TW fanfic - Book 2/4)

Part Twenty-One

 Siva’s POV

The next morning I drag myself out of bed, before looking around at my surroundings. I then realise that I’m in Jay’s guest room. That’s right, he let me stay round. I remember now. I throw my clothes on, before making my down the stairs and into the kitchen, where Jay is already sitting, with two plates laid out the table. I walk in with a smile on my face.

“Thanks for letting me stay, mate” I tell him, with a smile. I then walk over to the first seat I see and I sit down. As I pick up my piece of toast, I feel someone tap me in my stomach. I look down, slightly startled at what I just felt. I then notice a small boy standing next to me. He has big blue eyes and blond hair.

“Is there something you’re not telling me?” I ask Jay, as I look back up at him. He laughs for a second, before shaking his head.

“Well hello little fella” I say, as I ruffle his hair slightly.

“Hey Siva” I hear a female voice say. I slowly look up to see who it is. As my eyes scan her body, I can feel my heart beating faster. When I finally reach her face, I feel sick to my stomach. It’s Rheanna.

“What are you doing here?” I ask her whilst scowling.

“It’s nice to see you, too” she smirks. How can she find this funny? What’s she doing here? Why has Jay let her into her house? What the hell is going on? And most importantly, who does she think she is? I hate her for what she did to Nathan. Not only did she lie about little Leo to him, but she then ran off with the man that abused her. Why would anyone choose to do that? Is she crazy?

I suppose if I was in any other position I would be able to forgive and forget, but right now I can’t. Not when she did exactly the same thing to Lewis, that Claire is doing to me. I don’t think I will be able to look Nathan in the eye later either. I feel so sorry for Renee after everything that happened to her. No one understood what she went through, but now I do. She went through the suicide stage too, the only difference was, there was hope for her. What hope have I got? She had little Lucy to think about and that’s what kept her strong. I have none of that.

I’m not going to slip back into those feelings again though. I need to stay strong, for me. I need to make sure that Claire is punished for what she’s done. I don’t want her to think “Now Siva’s gone, I can move on with someone else and no one will ever know I cheated on him” because that’s not true and I want everyone to know what lying, cheating slut she is!

“Hello?” I hear Jay say. I shake my head at the thought of everything and then I notice that both Jay and Rheanna are both staring at me.

“What?” I ask, in confusion.

“I said, we have to drop Rheanna and Leo off at the school before we go to the studio” he tells me.

“Ok then” I sigh. I don’t really want to be in the same room as Rheanna let alone the same vehicle.

“Come on then” he says, as he stands up from the table. I soon follow his lead and we soon find ourselves in the car. I’m in the front next to Jay, whilst Rheanna and Leo are in the back. It’s not long before we pull up at the school and we’re free from Rheanna. As the door finally closes and we watch Rheanna and Leo walk off down the road, I turn to Jay, with an eyebrow raised.

“What the hell is she doing, staying with you?” I ask him, bitterly, as Jay pulls the car away from the path and begins to drive.

“Well I had to” he sighs.

“No you didn’t, you could have said no. Does Nathan know about this?” I ask him, knowing that he won’t be pleased when he finds out.

“He’s the one who brought her to me” he sighs again.

“What? How did that happen?” I ask him.

“Well I got a knock on the door the other night, so I answered it, as you do and it was Nathan. So I was just like what the hell do you want? It was like quite late as well. Then he asked me if I would take Rheanna and Leo in because they needed a place to stay and they couldn’t stay at his because of Renee. I couldn’t say no. Yes she did wrong, but I can tell she’s sorry. She’s made mistakes in the past, but there’s no denying that they were for a good reason. She just wanted to protect her family. Can you really criticise that?” he asks me and I can tell there’s something different in his voice. I don’t know why he’s taking sympathy on her; at the end of the day she lied to our best friend and then left him for some crazy psycho. Who does that?

“What about Lewis?” I ask her.

“He’s in prison apparently” he says and at that moment I realise what happened. He must have been abusing her again. It’s not really a surprise though. We all knew it would happen; we just put our heads down and hoped for the best. What you don’t know can’t hurt you after all.

As we pull up outside the studio, I feel a lump appear in my throat. I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I can face everyone after what happened yesterday. I just hope I never feel that low again and I hope if people find out about it, then they’ll understand. I was in a bad place, but I think I’m ok now. Sure I’m still depressed, that isn’t going to go away over night, but I no longer feel like hanging myself. I’m just focusing on getting my revenge now and that is going to be the best part of this whole experience.

We get out of the car and as we get into the building, I freeze. What am I supposed to do now? It’s like I can’t move. I take a deep breath before trying to move again, but I feel sick.

“Are you ok?” Jay asks me.

“I can’t do it” I tell him, as I feel a tear roll down my eye. Why do I have to be so weak? This isn’t what I wanted. This isn’t who I am.

“It’s alright” Jay says, as I feel his hand touch my back for comfort. I can’t be more grateful for what he’s doing for me.

I manage to get up to the studio and as I open the door, my heart stops dead.