I Wish I Could Say It Was a Mistake

Chapter 31: I was so stupid for letting you go

Luckily, I haven't had to wait too long to see Harry again, because I've been going mad. 

I can't get him out of my mind, and I'm constantly thinking about the time we spent together and how sweet, funny and handsome he is.

I'm really excited about today. Although I know we won't ever be more than friends after what happened with Niall, I still like to imagine that we might recover our friendship.

This time, I meet Harry at the studio. As he opens the door, I take a step back to appreciate how pretty he looks. Is he wearing makeup? It looks like he's wearing eyeliner, and it looks amazing on him. It's probably because of that interview he said he had this morning.

And his clothes... I just wish he'd wear these high trousers all the time. He looks so comfortable in them, as if that's exactly what he was born to wear.

"Hullo.", he smiles, and instinctively I lean forward to hug him.

He hugs me back and then closes the door behind me. 

"How's it going?", I ask.

All the nerves I'd accumulated these days disappear as I follow him through a corridor and into a room. Being with Harry feels like home, it always has. I'm so comfortable next to him, and he makes me feel so safe and cared for.

"Make yourself at home.", he mutters and goes back out of the room.

I look around. There are two black sofas and a coffee table. The walls are painted black and full of weird abstract paintings. I notice a guitar near the door, as well as lots of speakers on the ceiling.

Harry comes back with a bald man in a suit, and I stand up to receive them.

"Jeff, this is Layla."

"Hi Layla.", he shakes my hand, and then shows me a piece of paper, "I'm sure you understand that we need you to assure that you will not reveal anything about the songs we're about to show you."

"Yes, of course."

Harry crosses his hands on his chest and smiles at me comfortingly. 

Jeff then makes me sit and puts the contract on the coffee table in front of us. He hands me a pen and I take it while scanning the document. Finally, we all sign it and he leaves the room.

"I hope you came psychologically prepared.", Harry lifts one of his eyebrows and smiles cheekily.

"I was born ready, Styles."

He laughs and sits next to me on the sofa. He grabs a tablet that was leaning on the table and starts pressing things on it.

"So how's your day been?", he asks, as he keeps typing.

"Good." I answer, and then sigh, "I'm helping with Ariana Grande's dress for the Grammies and it's driving me crazy."

"Really? That's really cool though. I'm sure she'll look great."

"Yeah, but it's such a competitive world and it can get very stressful sometimes." Harry nods and smiles. He lets the tablet rest on his knees as if he'd finished typing what he had to, so I say, "So, are you going to show me some songs or not?"

He laughs and sticks his tongue out, "Alright, alright. So this is the first song on the album. It's called Golden."

"Just play it already!"

As the song starts, I feel shivers all through my spine. It transmits such good vibes and the melody is so perfect I immediately love it.

And the lyrics... 'I know you were way too bright for me'. Yep, accurate.

'I don't wanna be alone, but I can feel it take ahold. I can feel you take control of who I am and all I've ever known. Loving you's the antidote'... It just reminds me so much of when Harry and I met, it's almost as if he'd written it for me.

"Wow.", I say as it ends.

"You liked it?"

"I loved it."

He then asks me if I want to listen to Watermelon Sugar, Lights Up or Adore You and I tell him that I don't. I've already listened to all of those and I don't want to waste a second.

And so he starts playing Cherry. OMG. I rest my head on his shoulder feeling sorry for him and he kisses my forehead tenderly. Who's the b*tch speaking French and what did he do to my Harry to make him feel like this?

Then, he starts playing Falling.

'What am I now? What if I'm someone I don't want around?'

The chorus hits me straight in the face and I can feel my eyes fill with tears.

'What if I'm someone you won't talk about?'

Harry looks at me worried but it's too late, I'm already crying. 

'And I get the feelin' that you'll never need me again.'

As it finishes, I laugh and wipe the tears off my cheek.

"Whoa. I think I've got a favourite."

"Falling? Really?"

"I love how raw it is. You've got so much talent, Harry. You make us feel exactly what you're feeling while you're singing."

"Thank you, honestly."

When I thought my mood couldn't get worse, To Be So Lonely starts playing. 

However, it gets better again as he shows me She, Sunflower vol. 6, Canyon Moon and Treat People With Kindness, to the point in which we both end up dancing and clapping our hands in a silly and goofy way.

"Just one more.", Harry shrugs.

"I hope it's a good one."

Fine Line starts playing and I can't believe my ears. It's got something psychedelic in it, but I love it.

As it ends, Harry turns everything off and looks at me expectantly.

"So, tell me what you think."

"I just think you're awesome and it's an incredible album. You totally deserve to be where you are and I'm not saying that just to be polite."

"Thanks. It means a lot to me that you like them."

"Well, I don't like them. I love them, genuinely."

He smiles again and I notice he's blushing slightly, in his own way.

I hit him softly in the shoulder and laugh.

"What?", he grins, turning his body towards me so we're face to face.

"What?", I repeat, with a childish voice.

He bites his lip and I can't help staring at his mouth. How I wish he'd kiss me right now.

Friends. We're just friends.

But he looks so good, and he's smiling at me with those eyes...