Batman: Back Again

Struggling

My eyes snap open as sweet drips off my face. My breathing is heavy and rough as I feel anxiety rise within. I blink back tears that have pricked my eyes as I glance around my surroundings.

I'm not sure where I am, but I hear water, like the ocean, or a river. It's definitely a little river or stream. A cold breeze blows through as I look to my right and see the water I hear. It flows through the rocks, making the moon from the cracks above shine.

I look to my left and see a small table next to me with an empty syringe. I lean my head back on the cot and close my eyes. Trying to control my growing anxiety. I sniff and open my eyes again and decide to move myself. But my body doesn't obey.

I'm so tired and worn out. My body aches just thinking of moving. But I have to get out of here, wherever here is...

I hear drips of water and lift my head. The wind hollows from the cracks in the cave. It's a cave I'm in. My eyes wander around the cave and my attention is drawn to a case with a suit hung in it.

It's Batman's.

I shake my thoughts away as I feel something tugging within. The urge to kill Batman. But I don't want too... I can't.

I slowly sit up and feel my bones crack. I groan as I stand up and stumble trying to regain my strength. I stumble over to another table and drop a glass that was on it. Making it shatter into a million pieces, the sound echos off the cave. I swallow my fear once again and stand up tall again.

I hear footsteps behind me, but I bother not to turn and face the footsteps those feet belong too.

"Your awake."

My body stiffens as I hear the voice.

"Your the voice of the shadow." I say turning to face the voice.

The air leaves my lungs as I look at the tired, broken and beaten man. He's got a black eye, a two small cuts on his cheek, like a cat scratch. His eyes no longer hold a fire for life, instead they hold fear and sadness. He's tired. Very tired.

"If shadow you mean Batman? Then yes."

I sigh a laugh and feel tears prick my eyes.

"What's happened to me Bruce."

I find myself telling him this rather then asking. I'm sick of asking the question. It's just a statement at this point.

"The Joker that's what." Bruce says shrugging his shoulders.

I rub my eyes as my head pulses in pain. I feel like I've been hit by a train.

"How do you feel?" He asks moving a little closer.

"How do I look?" I breathed out a laugh.

"You've been messed up for about a year now. I didn't think it would work." Brice admits out loud to himself and me.

"What would work?"

"The antidote." Bruce puts his hands in his pockets and walks towards me. "The Joker has taken some of your DNA and recoded it into some sort of- mental state for you to believe. Which was to kill Batman."

"Sounds about right." I say nodding my head.

"I would have helped you faster but... the night you warned me, I finally found a match to battle whatever the Joker gave you, I found your antidote. Which was hard because it was made specially for you."

"I'm honoured." I say smiling.

My smile fades as Bruce is only watching me with concern.

"He really messed you up." Bruce mumbled.

I stand myself up straight and lift off the table. I close my eyes as my head spins. I open my eyes and lock with Bruce's. They're sad and lonely.

"Yeah." I whispered.

Bruce walks towards me as I look away from him. He moves closer and takes his hands out of his pockets.

"I think you should rest."

Tears stream down my face. I gasp for air as I have very conflicted thoughts. Bruce reaches his hand out for my cheek but I snap my head away. I squeeze my hands on my arm and realize I'm probably gonna leave a bruise on it. I grind my teeth together and feel something snap within me.

Suddenly, I lunge my body at Bruce and tackle him to the ground. He falls with a grunt as the air in his lungs are taken from him. I sit on his chest and am about to wrap my hands around his neck when he puts his knee up, knocking my back causing me to fall forward.

Bruce takes the chance and pushes me off him, he stands up as I scramble to do the same.

"Don't do this Chrissy."

"Stop talking." I say as hot tears fall.

I lift up my leg and try and kick him but Bruce gets my leg and looks at me for a moment before twisting my legs, making me turn around and fall forward. I see the glass I broke earlier and grab a piece, I feel it cut my hand but I stand up as Bruce looks away for a moment. Most likely due to the shock of me fighting this.

I kick his back as he falls forward, swiftly turning on his back as I jump onto him. I hold the piece of sharp glass up to his neck as he puts his hands up in surrender.

My body feels heavy as the sharp clean makeshift knife is pressing against his skin, my own blood dripping onto his neck. I grit my teeth as my breath is rough. I look into his eyes as see something. The hope he had, is gone. He's given up.

"Chrissy-" he gasps out.

I sputter out a cry and tears fall into my own blood. I drop the blade to the side and slide myself off Bruce. I pull my hands into my legs and push myself away from Bruce. I start to cry into my arms as my legs make their way up to my chest.

I feel like a lost child, lost on what to do.

Bruce sits up and watches me cry. He crawls towards me and puts his hand out. I flinch away from his touch.

"No- I might h-hurt you." I gasp out.

"We can work on this together." Brice says sitting next to me.

"But I was- I have to kill you."

"I'd rather risk myself to help you, then lose you for a year again." Brice says looking into my eyes.

He puts his arms around me and hold me close. I lay my head on his chest as I let my tears fall. I grip onto his shirt as I hear his heartbeat. I cry into him, hoping for all this madness in my head to go away.