boyfriend {k.c + m.p}

chapter 22

this chapter may be sad for some of you, so bring your tissues, (i'm sorry i love you all. *kith*)
—
2:44 pm
as mattia started to walk home, his group of friends tried to call his name before they all parted their particular blocks. mattia knew kairis block was just before his. kairi decided not to take part in screaming his friends' name, cause he was legitimately puzzled.

mattia stopped in his tracks, hearing kairis steps coming up to him. kairi looked at him confused, and started to walk a bit slower. mattias eyes filled with tears, he hated it here. ( *i hate it here meme.*)

"mattia?" he heard kairi whisper. he made the choice to start walking and to ignore his best friend.

kairi at this point, he was angry.

"so what now? you're going to fucking ignore me? for what?" kairi started to say, mattia still was walking as kairi was.

the wasian started to get even more pissed, his fists clenched ready to pop.
"i fucking gave you shelter, i fucking gave you almost everything. and you still are gonna be an asshole to me and the guys, what the fuck more do you want?" kairi screamed, instantly regretting it.

mattia stopped in his tracks, turned around with tears rolling down his face. kairis facial expressions dropped, his friend sobbing in his hands.

kairi ran to him and gave him the biggest hug, making mattia sob more into his small shoulder.

they were like that for awhile, kairi waited for the sniffles to slow. soon it did, mattia picked his head up slightly, their faces a couple inches apart.

the butterflies, yet again.

the italian leaned into his friends ear and whispered,

"i wanted this."

mattia leaned down for his best friends lips, but stopped a centimeter away and said, "but i cant."
kairi scoffed slightly, currently wanting to die right on the spot with his stupid blushed face.

"why not.." kairi asked with concern, slightly biting his lip making mattias breath hitch.

"aren't you scared of me?"

kairi broke eye contact to remember what he told him during an argument, he did.

"i-"

mattia whispered, "it's okay, kai. i know you are." kairi was speechless, he just stood there and tried to say something.

"kairi, i will get better for you."

kairi was left with nothing but the cold air.
-
5:34 pm

kairi laid in his bed, his homework splattered everywhere. he put his hands on his face rubbing his eyes, he pondered deeply about everything mattia said to him.

he will get better for me, the fuck does that even mean? he questioned to himself. he liked the way he was, a piece of shit with a heart. he wouldn't want his best friend to change.

but he also wouldn't mind him changing up the slightest bit.

whatever.
-
8:46 pm
*TRIGGER WARNING. HE DOESNT DO ANYTHING BUT IT MENTIONS, PLEASE BE AWARE MY BABIES. ILL LET YOU KNOW WHEN ITS OVER*

mattia walked into his bathroom, his eyes are still swollen as ever. there was still tears stained on his face, he wiped it with his wrist, sniffling.

he closed his eyes, thinking about what his mother said to him.

"mattia, your father is in prison. there was a...mob bust. he fled to italy but caught him at the airport, we don't know when he's coming back.."

he opened his eyes, staring into his own at the mirror. he started to cry again.

he didn't cry because of him in prison, he cried because of how much a disappointment he was to his father; being closeted, liking his best friend, and overall not making his papa happy. all he asked for was forgiveness and a lovable father.

now he won't get either.

mattia opened the mirror door, finding the box of razors that he hasn't touched in years. he takes a closer look at the razor sharped edges with dry blood from years past.

he takes out one, looking at how it shines from the bathroom light.

'do it, f*g.'

'better off not getting better.'

'you're a fucking mistake.'

mattia started to cry even more, his face started to hurt. he pulled his sleeve up, hesitating whether he should even do it or not.

'kairi is better off on his own, you hurt him enough.'

he closed his eyes, putting the razor to his skin, dragging i-
*OVER*

*ding!*

his phone dinged, making him forget about what he was doing. he took it out seeing the message:

from: kai🌻
here's the homework, cause i knew you wouldn't have done any of it.

*4 attachments*

you're welcome

mattia smiled slightly at the message he received, he texted back:

to: kai🌻
thank u..

he really didn't know what the say other than that, he shook his head and paid attention to what he was doing. he put all of it away, chewing his bottom lip vigorously and leaving the bathroom.

mattia plopped on his bed, taking a deep breath in and exhaling. he really hated today, super-duper hated it.

he really wanted to be with kairi, but he knows he will hurt the poor baby. he will mentally destroy him to the point kairi will turn into himself.

he reached for his phone again, seeing kairis messages. he wanted to say something else, maybe to cheer him up?

to: kai🌻
goodnight, kai
sleep tight don't let the bed bugs bite:)

what a fucking idiotic response,

kairi would've loved it anyway.
-

hello my dear humans!
i hope you guys are staying safe!!
i just wanna say how happy i am for all of the love on this book! i honestly didn't expect it to blow up like this:) but i'm so glad it did!

all of the comments make me laugh and smile and ahhh i just wanna hug all of you :((

anywhooooo, i'll see you guys soon!!
I LOVE YOU ALL
STAY SAFE!