Stonehearts 8: Peridot

Twenty One

He tugged my hand. As our bodies collided, we both fell unceremoniously on the floor. It must've hurt his back basing from the impact I've heard plus my body weight on top of him, but he didn't care.

He snaked his arms around me, my own collaring his neck. He buried his face on the crook of my neck. His tears, his shallow breaths, his breathless apologies, his body's trembles, seeped my whole being until I am pouring my own emotions on his shoulder, too.

The way he held me, as if he wanted me to meld with him. There's no signs of him wanting to let go. We stayed there, tides and waves of pooled emotions detonating around us.

It's hell not having him with me. And I'm a fool to think that for one second I can survive the separationg at all.

"I'm really sorry, baby." He whispered, leaving featherlight kisses on my neck up to the back of my ear.

"I know. Sorry rin."

He abruptly pulled away. His eyes bulging but bewilderment is evident there. "No, baby, no. This is on me. Ako ito. Nagpabulag ako sa galit at selos. You don't have to say sorry for being upset. It's me. I fucked up."

I lightly filed the pad of my thumb on his jaw, loving the prickle feeling of his stubble. "I have my own shortcomings as well, Kiel. Hindi kita inintindi. I'm too self-absorbed and I didn't take any effort to know you. All of you. Nakontento ako sa kung ano mang ipinapakita mo. Nagalit ako dahil pakiramdam ko niloko mo ako, pero ang katotohanan wala naman akong karapatan. My ways are hyprocrital to be exact. I have no right to be angry since I intend of using you for my gain from the very beginning."

He shook his head, his lips finding my forehead, smoothing the lines there. He brushed the green locks out of my face, clipping it behind my ear. His other hand continued to trace the bumps on my spine with light touches.

"Ako ang gustong magpagamit sa'yo. I wouldn't agree in the first place if I don't. I'm drawn to you in every possible way. I feel fiercely possessive of you and if that's the only thing you can offer me to get you, I will take. I will accept it. But that doesn't mean I'd stop there. I'm a selfish bastard and I'll do whatever it takes to own you."

Though his words we're assertive and belligerent, there's something about the way he looks at me that contradicts it. My insides are churning, my heart mirroring the fast pace of his. His eyes shows warmth, a calming one, like that of a summer sky.

He cupped my cheeks, our stare never wavering. And before he can even say it out loud, I knew.

"I love you, Peridot. When I found you, it's not only finding the missing piece of me, I discovered the best part of me. It's you. And it will always be you."

I was stunned. Words are beyond my reach and I cried. I didn't know I wanted, no craved, to hear those words from his mouth. The fear of losing him is greater than my terror of depending my happiness on someone else.

He consoled me, whispering those three words on my ear until it's all I can think about, he's all I can think about. His voice, his tepidity, his love.

Our private bubble got disturbed when we heard the elevator dinging followed by footstep echoing through the hall. I perked my head up and he grinned at me. God, I missed him grinning at me.

"Let's settle in, yeah?" He asked, rubbing his nose on mine.

I nodded my head, still too overwhelmed to speak. He lead me through the foyer, receiving area, and perched me on the gray suede couch is in vast living room.

"I'll just lock the door. I'll be back." Paalam niya saka humalik. Reluctance was clear on his face, like it's taking everything in him to part from me.