Stonehearts 8: Peridot

Thirty Four

"I understand and respect your decision." The mellow tone of his voice echoed. There was a hint of sadness on his lips but I dare not comment on it.

I nodded my head slowly. I was absolutely, utterly sure and unsure at the same time. In my mind I know I was doing what's best for Vi, but my heart says otherwise.

Kiel looked at me earnestly before he cupped my cheeks. "Before you say it, there's nothing for you to say sorry about. This is on me and I'm willing to pay for my mistakes."

"Thank you, Kiel."

"Nothing to thank me about, baby. Anything and everything for you, right?" He answered before planting a chaste kiss on my forehead.

I let him linger for awhile in the house. It felt so unnatural to have him here after all that has happened. However, I knew in my heart that I am in the right place, in the right time, in the right arms.

Vi is out with Aiden. Kiel requested if he could see her but I refused immediately, like what I had rehearsed in my mind countless of times before deciding to move back here in Manila. To be honest, I really don't know how Kiel would react. But he took it like a pro and respected my decision. 

It's a tough one to make. I'm dying to have Vi finally in her father's arms, however, I'm still uneasy with this whole Desiree fiasco. Kiel is absolutely positive her kid is not his, but I want it in paper. I want it in black and white so I would have something to hold onto.

I don't want Vi to be included in this mess if ever things go sideways. I don't want my precious angel baby to be in the middle of the crossfire when the DNA result shows that the kid is indeed Kiel's.

It's painful. It's messy. It's horrible. It's difficult.

Pero hindi naman siguro masakit, magulo, at mahirap kung hindi worth it sa huli.

"Lalim ng iniisip mo. Everything okay up here?" Kiel inquired, lightly tapping my temple.

Oh, if only he knew the ruins he had built inside my head. "Yeah. Aiden and Vi will arrive in awhile."

He sighed. "Okay, I better get going then." I led him to the front door. He gave me a quick kiss on the lips but just stood there, as if he's gathering his thoughts.

I slanted my head, "Everything okay?"

He sighed and grabbed both my hands in his. "I've been dying to know, Peridot." Another sigh. "The baby? Is it ours?"

My heart skipped a thousand beats. Should I say it now? Should I deny? Scenarios of different outcomes shoot across my mind like a goddamn battlefield.

"Sorry. I should know it in your set timeline, not mine." He quickly backtracked. He gave my hands a tight squeeze before he finally left.

I quickly went inside and leaned on the door while clutching my heart. I felt like I ran a marathon. I just really can't tell him the whole truth with these uncertainties clouding us. Kung mahirap na noong kami palang ang nagsisimula, mas mahirap ngayong may Vi na akong iniisip.

----

"Dothy, the pedia." Aiden immediately said when I was helping him unload Vi and her things from his car. "Is the same woman from the grocery."

I don't know if it's a question or a statement. I chuckled, "Yes, Aiden. I've mentioned that before to you. Twice." I answered as we walk side-by-side towards the house, Vi in my arms and Vi's things in his.

"Yeah, I mean, I thought you were joking me." He whispered, appearing annoyed as he set down the stroller, the baby bag, & the stuff toy in the living room.