Starting Over {S.S}

11

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I pull away first as I anticipate Sebastian's reaction. He'd probably say it was a mistake or that he was sorry. He looks into my eyes, never letting go of my face as his hand still cups my cheek. He brushes his thumb back and forth, sending shivers down my spine as I break eye contact with him. "It's okay, I know what you're going to say", I pull away from him and keep my eyes trained on my socks. I feel him lift up my chin and he looks nervous as he watches me, "I don't regret it, if that's what you're implying"

I look up at him with hopeful eyes, "Are you sure?". He holds my face in his hands ever so gently and nods his head with a small smile. "I just-", he starts. I nod my head in understanding as I finish his sentence, "-Need time?". He nods his head and removes his hand from my face as I nod my head and bite my lip. "I should go, I need to pick up a few thing from the grocery store, do you need anything?", I ask him. He shakes his head, "No, but if you see anything you think I might like, don't hesitate to buy it", he smiles at me. I let out a laugh and grab my car keys and my wallet. "I'll be back soon. Why don't you call Anthony and Chris to come over?"

"Yeah, I think I will. And Dani?", he calls out as I reach the front door. "Yeah?", I turn around and watch him as he hesitates for a moment. "Never mind. Be careful, please". I nod my head and leave the house as I enter my car. I drive off down the street and towards the grocery store, hoping that there wouldn't be a lot of people today. I park my car and grab a carriage as I weave through the different aisles, picking up the few items that I needed and occasionally grabbing an item or two when it reminds me of Sebastian.

When I'm done I check out and head back to my car, but when I sit down and put my seatbelt on, I don't drive off. I needed a moment to think. I can't believe that Sebastian and I kissed. I specifically told myself not to fall for him, because of my attachment to him in a life that I thought I had with him. I told myself not to get attached to him, and I'm doing the complete opposite. But did I really care at this point? He made me happy and it felt right with him. Why couldn't I just let myself be happy for once in my life?

I shake my head and start the car, moving out of the parking lot and onto the main road as I make my way back home. When I pull into the driveway there's another car parked beside my empty parking spot. I recognize that car and know that Sebastian had indeed called Anthony and Chris over. I grab the grocery bags from the passenger seat and lock the car doors as I enter the house. I smile as I hear laughter coming from the living room, one of those laughs being louder than the others and I recognized it immediately as Sebastian's. I was happy to see him slowly recover.

I walk into the kitchen as the guys hadn't seen me yet, and wash my hands before preparing a small snack for them. I clear my throat to make my presence known and they turn around to look at me. "Dani! How are you", Chris smiles as he comes over to hug me. I smile and hug him back, "I'm good, how have you been?"

He pulls away from me as I set down the platter in my hands on the coffee table. "I've been good. Auditioning for new roles". I smile at him and turn to Anthony. He hugs me tightly, "I've missed you, you know?".

"I've missed you, too. How have you been? Any exciting things I should know about?", I ask him as we all sit down on the couch. "Not really, I've been taking it slow the past couple of weeks. What about you guys? Anything exciting happen during these past few weeks? Has Sebastian driven you crazy yet?", Anthony laughs.

My eyes widen as I look at Sebastian and I feel my face heat up. "Um, not really. We've had a lot of time to get to know each other better and it's been nice having someone in the house", I tell them. Sebastian sighs in relief as I narrow my eyes at him. Chris looks between the two of us and squints his eyes, "Something happened between you two...". Anthony does the same thing and nods his head, "There's tension, a lot of tension"

"Nothing happened!", both Sebastian and I say simultaneously. The boys raise their eyebrows at us and I know they're not buying it, "I broke her plant", Sebastian says. I look at him and throw my head back, knowing that this for sure would give away what happened. Sebastian was a horrible liar. "I'm sorry, what?", Anthony laughs. "Early in the morning I was trying to find the bathroom and I knocked over her plant, so she had to come and clean it up"

"You really want me to believe that that's what happened between you two? I mean sure that could've happened but that's not what we're talking about", Chris laughs.  I nervously shove one of the snacks I prepared in my mouth and avoid eye contact with them. "Dani, are you okay?"

"I'm good", I say but it comes out muffled from the food in my mouth. I swallow harshly and smile at them nervously. "You kissed, didn't you?"

"No, what makes you say that?", I play it off as I lean back against the couch. Sebastian scratches the back of his neck and I close my eyes, knowing there's no way to avoid this. "Okay and so what if we did?", I say out loud. "I knew it!", Chris and Anthony gasp. I roll my eyes as I look down at my lap, because I knew that nothing would come out of that kiss. He said he needed time and he said that he didn't regret it, but that didn't mean he wanted to pursue something with me.

"And?", Anthony drags on. "And nothing", I grunt as I stand up. "You guys can stay for dinner, I'll be in the kitchen", I say as I walk away. I catch Sebastian looking at me and he quickly looks away, avoiding my gaze. I knew it.