Limerence: Untold Story Of Tears (BS2)

kabanata 8

Marahang hinaplos ni mama ang likod ko. I close my eyes. Sinusulit ko bawat sandali. Shit. This is one of the most comfortable thing I ever experienced. Para akong bumalik sa pagkabata. Yung pag nasugatan ako nakikita ko na ang natatarantang imahe ng aking ina napapalapit saakin. Nagaalalang nagtatanong at nag aalaga.

"Khaning" I heard her whispered. "Something going on, that you don't share with me"

Kinalas ko ang pagkakayakap. I sobbed. Umayos ako ng pagkakaupo. Kahit na gustong gusto kong umiyak. Pilit kong ngumiti ng harapin ko si mama.

"I'm okay ma" My voice crack. "Okay na ba si papa? B-bakit inaatake nanaman sya sa puso?"

My mom bite her lower lip. She smile at me after that.

"Anak. Tumatanda na kami." She caressly touch my hand. "Mangyayare talaga iyon. Maiiwan namin kayo," She force a smile.

Para naman may kumurot sa puso ko. Pakiramdam ko mas masakit pa ito sa kumpara sa lahat ng nangyayare saakin.

"Pero kampante naman ako sa maiiwan ko. I raise you well. You grown up with a good behavior" She voice crack.

Nanumig nanaman ang mata ko. Tumingala ako para bumalik ang luha sa tear duct. Shit. Para akong sinampal ng paulit ulit. I am busy wasting my time with a wrong person and I almost forgot those who stayed with me and accept me in my worst.

I almost forgot myself and my family.

Hindi ko napigilan na yumakap sa kanya. "M-ma. I'm so sorry" I sob. "Don't worry. Babawi ako. I will stay with you, again like before."

She chuckles. "I-I miss to hear that. I miss to create a video with you again."

Hindi ko na napagilan ang pag-iyak. Parang may bumara sa puso ko. I sob. Marahan kong hinaplos ang mukha ni mama.

"M-ma. You give my life, but I d-didn't spend a lot of time with you."

Mom chuckle. "Khaning. you are gift from god. Don't worry after this. We will bond alot"

I just nod. "Stay with me again, ma. I want to sleep with you again"

She laugh. "Naku. Naalala ko nung bata ka. Hindi iiyak ka kapag nasugatan ka. Kahit gaano kasakit, kasi natatakot ka na paluin ka namin"

I bite my lower lip. Memories bring back the happiness I felt back then.

"Gaano ba kasakit yan, khaning" She point my heart. "Para hagulgol ka ng ganon?"

My jaw dropped. I look at her eyes. I saw a woman who want to embrace her child. I gulp, intensely. What should I say?

"M-ma" I sigh. "I'm seeing a m-man. I knew he love someone but..."

"You fall in love?" She ask. I press my lips and nod.

"Ma. I d-dont know what happened. I just wake up one day and I am looking forward to be with him" I drop my look. "Ma. I love interaction with alot people. Kaya hindi ko alam kung paano ide-differentiate yung nangyare. Akala ko nga, normal lang ih-"

I look at my mother. She's smiling. Makailang beses pa syang tumango. Parang sinasabi nya na okay lang na mag kwento ako. Kasi makikinig sya.

"Days passed and I fell badly." I chuckle. "If I only takes Tresha's advice. I won't ended up like this"

Kumunot ang noo nang tumawa ang ina ko. "I should thank that man. He back my baby-"

"Ma. Look I'm hurt-" Pagmamaktol ko.

She smile. "That's love. You won't know you already fall. But if your feeling are mutual, he will be here and talk to you"

Para naman akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig doon. She's right. Baka ako lang talaga ang sadyang umasa sa taong wala naman akong pagasa.