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S i x t e e n

Unedited

(*possibly triggering)

Tom made us some pasta and we sat in the kitchen area and ate it.
The boys talked quietly amongst themselves and I just listened trying to make sense of it. Afterwards I helped clean up before going back up stairs to get into my pyjamas and to lie down as I was quite tired after travelling.
Jake followed me upstairs and into our room. He threw me one of his t-shirt's to wear and I happily excepted it. I went into the bathroom and striped, keeping just on just my underwear before putting on the plain white t-shirt. It was a bit big but it just made it comfier. The best part was that it smelt of him. I left the bathroom, dumping my clothes on the floor before joining a half naked jake in bed to watch some tv.

"I like it when you wear my clothes," jake winked at me making me blush. I hid my face in my hands as he chuckled at me doing so.
"You're cute when you blush!" He cooed, "I don't understand why you don't like it when I compliment you," he signed. I avoided eye contact while replying,

"I don't like them because I don't believe them." I simply said while jake looked shocked at my response, "what?" I asked confused.

"Your stunning, looks and personality why would you think that?" I just shrugged not wanting to explain everything to him.
"Am I missing something here?" He said quietly.

"I used to be bullied in second year and yes I know it was years ago but stuff like that sticks with you. Especially when it's not long after your brother tries to commit suicide." I explained knowing my eyes were watering.

"I'm so sorry I shouldn't have asked," he said suddenly regretting asking me, "Is your brother still alive?" He asked in almost a whisper, sounding almost as if he was scared of what I'm about to say.

"I don't know. He never came home after that. My mum never told me, in fact she'd never talk about him.
I don't believe he's dead though. He always seemed to strong to just, leave. He supposedly tried to commit suicide when I was in school and my mum was at work so maybe he never tried." I explained as he just listened carefully.

"What's his name?"

"Beau, he was 16 at the time."

"I only ask his name not his age," he sassed kissing me on the lips. I playfully punched his arm laughing a little at his stupid joke.

We decided to watch tv for a while until we got tired. It was about 3am and jake was fast asleep with his arms wrapped around my waist but I couldn't sleep.
I carefully slipped out of the bed and grabbed my makeup bag. I pulled out my earphones and iPod before sitting on the floor next to the bed.
I plugged my earphones into my iPod and pressed shuffle letting the music take over the silence.

'Lullaby' by Professor Green played first and i mimed along, pretending to shout the words.
Then 'Goodbye to you' by Ed Sheeran played next.
Then suddenly I heard movement coming from the bed. I looked up from the floor go see jake now sitting up in the bed looking at me.

"What are you doing down there?" He asked in a tired voice squinting when he saw the light of my iPod shining on my face.

"Nothing," I said quickly locking my iPod leaving us in complete darkness.

"Give me that." He said in a stern snappy voice. I played dumb asking him what he meant but he ended up getting out of the bed and taking it off of me.

"Sorry," I whispered a little while getting up off the floor.

"No, I'm sorry for snapping." He sighed bringing me into a hug. I don't know why but I started to cry a little.
"Why are you crying babe?"

"I don't know. I guess I've just been thinking about beau a lot. It's weird how my mum wouldn't tell me about him, she would either chance the subject or send me to my room, like it was some sort of punishment." I sighed letting the tears trickle down my face.

We got back into bed and jake turned on my iPod again giving me an earphone. He pressed shuffle and 'sleepwalking' by bmth played.

Should I sink or swim?
Or simply disappear?

"This can be our dirty little secret," jake whispered quietly while smirking. I nodded my head laughing a bit.

This chapters awful.

I changed the bio(?) for this story:-) Do you like it or should I change it back?