Songs For Women (BWWM)

Stupid In Love (4)

Song: Stupid In Love by Rihanna 

[Saturday 10:06am]

LAILA’S POV

I woke up with a headache. The struggle was real.

The sun was pouring through the window, warming my face. I stretched and looked around in my empty bed, putting the pieces of last night together. I remember the hospital. I think I remember crying in Jorden’s arms but I hope I imagined that part.

*Stupid in Love by Rihanna*

I limped into the bathroom since one of my legs was asleep. There was a soft knock at the door. I went to answer it, looking through the peephole first. And I jumped at the sight of him. There was no way in hell I was opening that door. It was Cameron Waters.

I met Cameron Waters a few years ago in a creative writing class I was taking at the university. We dated for almost a year until I realized he was crazy.

He would call me at least 8 times a day, just to have a hold on me. He would constantly talk about how I wasn't a size 10 like other girls yet he was accusing me of sleeping with other guys. He accused me of sleeping with his friends or using him for money. His pockets weren’t even that deep!

One night, I had gotten a text from my partner in a group project while I was at Cameron’s house and he went off. He was throwing things at me, hitting me, kicking me. I hated crying in front of others but by the time he was done with me, that was all I could do. 

All of a sudden he was “sorry”. He said he was sorry 46 times that night and kept trying to kiss on me, saying he knew how to make me feel better.

I remember it so clearly. He forced himself on me with everything he had but I never stopped fighting. I pressed charges and when he was sentenced, I thought it was all over. But even when he was out of my life he was affecting me still.

I started to become paranoid and eating even more. I stopped leaving my house. I stayed cooped up, doors locked, blinds closed. It wasn’t until I hit 260 pounds that I got tired of seeing myself so unhappy.

Cali convinced me to start going to the gym with her and I moved to my new place. Even though I dropped down to 175, I still have trouble feeling pretty to this day.

“Laila, baby, please open the door.” Cameron said, trying to sound sorrowful. “I know you’re in there, did you get the picture I sent you? You’ll always be a part of me.”

I ran back to my room, scrambling for my phone.

It was weird since my phone said the message was opened already. It was a picture of Cameron with his shirt off. I zoomed in to see “Laila” tattooed in cursive on the left side of his chest.

Underneath the message read: I love you baby, I’ll be home soon.

I went back to the door. “Just leave me alone.” I said with desperation in my voice.

I couldn’t even cry. I was too shocked to see him outside my door. My head was pounding. I stood with my head pressed to the cool door which soothed some of the pain. It was quiet.

BANG BANG BANG!

He slammed his fists on the other side of the door. “Laila, I’m not going to keep playing these games with you bitch, open this door!” he said aggressively but still trying not to be too loud. I began to dial the police.

“Laila, baby…” He whispered this time. I looked through the peephole.

“I’m calling the cops now get away from me!” I yelled.