Help Me, Mom | Demi Lovato

41

Alex's POV
"Maddie is going to be picking you up from therapy today. You're going to hang out with her. Okay?" Mom reminded me as we were sitting in the parking lot of my therapist's office. I still don't understand why she can't go inside with me.

"Why can't you go in with me? I don't want to be there by myself!" I begged and whined.

"You love Mrs. Jones, baby girl. We can spend time together tomorrow. Just me and you. How does that sound?" Mom bargained.

"I love her.. but.. nevermind. Fine. I'll go by myself." I caved in.

"I love you, baby girl. Tell her anything you're feeling. Alright?" Mom kissed my cheek.

"I love you too, and alright." I replied as I got out of the car. I shut the car door and walked towards the door. It feels like the first day of school. Which is hell by the way. I slowly entered the building and was greeted by Mrs. Jones.

"Good morning, Alexis. I'm glad you're here." Mrs. Jones smiled as she looked up from her laptop.

"Whatever." I mentally rolled my eyes as I sat down in my usual spot. Mrs. Jones gave me a look as if to say get rid of the attitude.

"Your Mom told me about what happened two nights ago." Mrs. Jones started saying. I don't remember what happened really. I guess I grabbed a knife and threatened to kill myself. "Can you explain why you did that?" She continued.

"I honestly don't know." I shrugged.

"What do you mean by that, Alexis?" Mrs. Jones looked up as her glasses were sitting on the tip of her nose.

"I mean.. like.." I struggled to form a sentence, trying to hold back tears. "One second I was in my room, and then the next I'm in the kitchen in Max's arms. I guess my mind went blank."

"I see." Mrs. Jones said as she was writing something down on her clipboard. "Have you been hearing voices recently?"

"Yes, all the time. They tell me to cut, purge, or harm myself in any way possible. They tell me I'm not good enough and that I don't deserve to live." I replied as a tear slipped out of my eyes.

"I see.. have you been taking your medicine?" Mrs. Jones asked, referring to my antidepressants.

"Um..." I bit my lip nervously. If I'm being honest, I never took it in two weeks. Why? 'Cause I trapped myself in my room for that period of time. "No." I spit out quickly.

"I want you to start taking your medicine again. Okay? If what you're experiencing is worse or still the same then we will bump up your medication." Mrs. Jones replied. I nodded and before I walked out the door she handed me a Dum Dum lollipop. I'll just give it to Maddie. I don't want to gain more weight.

"How was therapy?" Maddie asked as I got in the passenger seat of her car.

"It was alright, I guess. It's tiring." I replied nonchalantly.

"How about we do something fun, yeah?" Maddie asked as she plugged her phone in the AUX cord and pressed play.

"Like what?"

"We could go to the pier downtown. Go and get some snacks from there and ride all the rides till we puke." Maddie laughed. The idea of food down at the pier made me uneasy. It's all sweets and junk food.

"Yeah, sure." I agreed. I don't want her to be suspicious.

"Yes! I missed the pier." Maddie exclaimed as we were heading in the direction of it.

"College life is busy I'm guessing?"

"You don't even know! I love it though, so it's okay." Maddie responded as we pulled into a parking space.