The beeping of the machines I was linked to only increased my state of panic, as a nurse put an oxygen mask over my mouth and nose. It was hard for me to breathe at that point, as I didn't understand what was happening to me. I tried my best to iden...
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I put the hairdryer down and sighed heavily as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I was more than anxious at that point as Michael and I's big night was just around the corner. I couldn't help but think of how things could go wrong: what if I tripped on the red carpet? What if I made a fool out of myself in front of Michael's friends and acquaintances? I knew how important this night was to him as he was awarded with the Humanitarian Award; this was as important as the awards he was nominated for his work as an artist.
My fiancé was probably as anxious as I was because he wasn't fond of talking in front of an audience, as crazy as it seemed. Michael would tell you that this and performing were two very different things. He felt very vulnerable when it came to going on stage to deliver a speech, while he felt like he was invincible when he was performing.
Just like me, Michael was somewhere around the house, getting prepared with Karen for the big event. Of course, his make up artist offered me her help that I kindly refused. I still wanted to keep a certain distance with Michael's world: if I was able to do something by myself, then I would do it. I was totally capable of doing my own make up and hair, no matter how rare it was for me to do it. I opted for a light smokey eye look – basically the only fancy makeup I could do. Then, I started curling my hair until it almost doubled in volume. I pulled off this look to one charity gala Carl and I went a few years back, and I remembered getting compliments about it, hence the reason why I put that much effort into it.
A smile appeared on my nervous face when I looked at my reflection in the mirror as I found myself being satisfied with the way I looked. Deep inside of me, I knew I didn't care about what people might think of me. All I cared about was what Michael would think. I wanted him to be proud to introduce me as his fiancée to his fellow artists.
It was now time for me to put my black sequin slip dress on, which was probably the fanciest dress I have ever worn in my entire life. But quickly came the moment I dreaded the most: putting my stilettos on. Walking became easier as days went by, but I didn't have the chance to walk with stilettos yet, without the help of my cane. This time, it was just me, myself and my stilettos. When I stood up with the shoes on to get a full look at myself, I felt like I would lose my balance at any time. The feeling was weird, but as I looked at myself in the mirror, a feeling of pride replaced it quickly. I was happy with the way I looked, but above all, I felt confident, which didn't happen in ages.
I grabbed my clutch, in which I made sure to put some Big Red gums in case Michael would want some, and left the room to pack my son's bag for the night. I didn't take any clothes because I knew Faraji still had plenty at the loft, I only cared for the essentials: his stuffed tiger and his comforter without which he couldn't sleep at night. I put them in his little backpack that I put over my shoulder, and walked out of his room.
I walked slowly down the long hall, still careful not to trip on my own two feet and followed the voices through the house that led me to the living room. In the distance, I saw Karen who was taking care of my fiancé's hair and makeup. However, the thing that caught my attention right away was Faraji as he was running in my direction, calling my name over and over again.
