A Way To Your World

Chapter 36

AWTYW - Choose

Hearing those words echoed inside my head over and over again. I didn't even know how I managed to excuse myself from Kuya after my talked with Abuelo. I was walking at the hallway, but my mind was clearly floating away.

Marriage..

It kept on repeating.

"You didn't know about it? I thought you knew since your Mom and Dad told me that you wouldn't oppose to it and you'll do it. And I could already see how close you were with Ash. He's your boyfriend, right?"

That kept on running around my head. I wouldn't oppose to it... hindi sinabi sa akin nila Mom dahil alam nilang hindi ako tatanggi. Is that what they are trying to say? But don't I get a say on this? Wala ba akong karapatan na magbigay opinyon tungkol dito? Marriage. That's... a long time commitment. I would get tangled up with Ash even if my feelings for him was only at the extent of being friends. Alam na ba rin niya ito? What did he say about this? I'm sure he wouldn't agree just like this even if he likes me.

And how about him? We were only starting, we were only picking up the things that we left off to. Paano ko sasabihin sa kanya ito?

I feel like my head is throbbing from all the questions and worrying going through me. I gently massage my temples and was about to take the elevator on Ada's room, when I saw him talking with a patient that was on his dextrose. Parang may kung ano siyang sinabi rito na nagpagaan sa kalooban ng pasiyente, dahil kanina lamang ay parang pinagsuklaban ng langit at lupa ang itsura nito. I read the patient's mouth saying thank you at him, while he gave him his smile and slightly patted his shoulder.

Do I have the strength to break him again? Kaya ko bang iwan siya sa pangalawang pagkakataon?

"Uh... Miss, papasok ba kayo?" I snapped back into my senses when I heard a lady's voice from behind.

Nakita ko naman na nakabukas na pala ang elevator. "Y-Yes," I said and went inside.

"You look stress. Parang ikaw nanganak sa atin, ah?" Ada said when I got inside her room.

Marahan naman akong umiling sa kanya. "Don't mind me. Ikaw? How are you feeling?" I asked her.

"Exhausted, but after seeing my twins, it was all worth it." She smiled, but then later on she sighed.

"I know you wouldn't tell me, pero mukhang alam ko na kung anong dahilan ng pagka-stress mo," she said and offered a hug to me.

Napangiti naman ako ng malungkot at napayakap sa aking pinsan.

"I'm fine, Ada. I just... sometimes ask myself if I'll ever be enough for my parents," malumanay kong sinabi.

"For me, for us... you are. They just don't see it. At hindi mo kasalanan kung hindi nila makita 'yon." She patted my back. "And mark this to your head, okay? That there will always be someone who will appreciate you for who you are. That even if you think of yourself in the most lowest way, you'll always be enough for them."

As she said those words, my heart automatically felt pain.

"Whatever Tita Amanda or Tito Frederick did or said that affected you this way, just always remember that I'm here to back you up. Always," she added and made me hugged her tightly.

After my talked with Ada, she didn't asked furthermore about my parents. She just comforted and let me take a breather from everything. I'm glad that she didn't forced me to say anything, knowing how she always wants me to spill the beans. Kasi ayaw ko munang magsalita tungkol sa nalaman ko, mas mabuti pa rin kung makakausap ko sila Mom tungkol doon.