"Snap Out Of It"~Camren~

Ch. 5

~Lauren's P.O.V~
I still couldn't process what was about to happen. It was all coming way to fast. "Lo.." "What Normani. Why do you guys look like a puppy got ran over, so what I got drunk, I'm fine now and it's not that big of a deal." Disbelief now came over as each one of them had there mouths agape. "When I found you...you said it was my fault. You said I hurt you. What were you talking about?" Oh no. Think fast Lauren. "I, um I was drunk I didn't know what I was saying." At first you could tell she didn't believe me but then gave me an understanding nod. "Just promise us this will never happen again. We have a show today and we just wanna put this behind us." The eldest of the room now finally spoke. "Yeah promise." "Okay good because it's your song choice tonight so you better get choosin'" I agreed and went back into my bunk. I let out a well needed deep breathe and felt the tense muscles in my body relax. I've been planning this song for weeks and it's been stuck in my head. It fits the situation perfectly and I actually couldn't wait to finally say my feelings aloud.
~
"So guys, um it's my song choice tonight and I thought I would pick something that has a lot of meaning to me right now. This is dedicated to a person that literally has my heart in the palm of their hands and doesn't even know it. It explains exactly how I feel and I need to get this off my chest. I wrote this song when I realized that the person I will always love will never love me the same way. So um...hope you like it." The background music began and I let the words roll freely off my tongue.
~
And I hate to say I love you
When it's so hard for me
And I hate to say I want you
When you make it so clear
You don't want me

I'd never ask you cause deep down
I'm certain I know what you'd say
You'd say I'm sorry believe me
I love you but not in that way

And I hate to say I need you
I'm so reliant
I'm so dependant
I'm such a fool

When you're not there
I find myself singing the blues
Can't bear
Can't face the truth

You will never know that feeling
You will never see through these eyes

I'd never ask you
Cause deep down I'm certain I know what you'd say
You'd say I'm sorry
Believe me
I love you
But not in that way

You'd say I'm sorry
Believe me
I love you
But not in that way
~
My 4 other band mates had no idea who I was talking about obviously but they were in awe. The crowd screamed and every once in a while I would hear someone yell 'Camren' which made singing even harder, I winced in pain every time I heard it as if someone was holding fire to my heart. I got choked up at how sensitive I was to the song. Towards the end tears weld up in my eyes and I couldn't help but let them run free from my now red stained orbs. Every couple of versus I would look at Camila. I couldn't read her emotions exactly but she looked confused a long with everyone else. In a way I saw sadness but that's probably just her pity. After we finished our encore we made our way into the better air conditioned bus. I plopped myself onto the couch and chugged the water bottle I found in the cup holder. "Hey Lo? Who was that song about. It seemed to hit you pretty hard." I looked over to Ally and I repeated the words in my head. "Someone that I love very much. I'm not ready to explain and I hope you understand that. It doesn't really matter though, just like I said in the song...I know what they'd say." I stared directly at Camz when I said that. Almost as If I was begging and pleading for her to see that the person I was talking about was her. "No you don't" the girl that had my heart let out. "Trust me Camz. I know the person better than they know themselves, if there was any reason for me to have hope I would've jumped at every chance I got." She was about to argue her opinion once more but then quickly closed her mouth. I couldn't help but stare at the way her lips formed into a fake smile. I could tell everyone was trying to figure out who this mystery person was. "Well if he doesn't like you back then he's obviously blind. Trust Dmac on this. You're so special and you deserve the best." "Thank you D that means a lot, but there's one little thing wrong with you're sentence." I lifted my head and gave a weak smile before I made my way back to my bunk. I had confused them already by even singing the song but now they were probably gonna pull some 'Pretty Little Liar's' shit just to figure this out. When really the answer was right in front of them. Sometimes to see things you just need too take a look at the view displayed in front of you instead of trying to focus on the minor little details..