Don't Cry

001

I tried to continue living even if my heart feels so empty ever since Lay left me. One thing I learned from everything that I have been through is that I shall not base my happiness on others.

I'm doing this for myself. I'm living for myself. Not for anybody else.

I thought I am finally free from all those unanswered questions, yet here I am again, questioning why did he leave without even saying goodbye? It hurts that he's gone but being stucked in the dark is the most hurtful one. I just hope that one day, I will come to a point that I'm done asking for questions that I guess will never have an answer.

"The hell! Ang hirap ng exam sa MAS," reklamo ni Kit habang kinukuha ang mga gamit niya.

I tried my best not to roll my eyes at him. Magrereklamo pero paglumabas ang results ay mas mataas naman ang score niya sa akin.

Tsk.

Mas magaling nga siya sa akin sa problems.

Nang matapos na niyang ipasok ang mga gamit niya sa itim niyang Jansport backpack ay agad niya itong isinuot at nilapitan ako.

"Tara," aniya kaya naman tumango na ako.

Aalis na sana kami pero naharang pa kami ng ilang kaklase upang tanungin ng mga isinagot namin sa test. We remained there for almost half an hour para lang makipag-compare ng sagot although ayoko talaga na nakikipag-compare. I'm just pointing sa testpapers nila kung anong letter ang sagot ko.

The test is done. All I need to do is move on and not dwell on it more.

After that we started walking in order to go to the parking lot.

"Kung mag-unwind kaya tayo bukas?" tanong ni Kit habang patuloy kami sa paglalakad.

Wala na rin naman kasi kaming schedule na exam bukas. This day was our last exam day at kahit pa-paano ay mabuting MAS ang panghuli dahil nakapag-aral pa nang mas maayos sa subject na iyon. Although tulad ng in-e-expect ng karamihan ay mahirap ang exam. Prof. Toralba is known to give difficult and challenging exams that's the reason why she is notorious in failing students.

"Ven?" aniya at doon ako natauhan na hindi pa pala ako nagsasalita.

"Sure. Saan naman tayo?"

"Movies?" suhestiyon niya kaya naman napatango ako.

"Not a bad idea though."

"Then it's settled. Dapat ay matuloy na ito ah," sipi niya na may pagbabanta sa boses niya.

Ilang beses na rin kasi kami nagplanong mag-movie pero hindi natutuloy dahil sa mga gawain at aralin sa school.

This time, I know it's going to happen especially now that we wanted to relax after a taxing midterm week. Halos wala na kasi kaming ibang ginawa ng mga nakaraang linggo kundi ang asikasuhin ang mga requirements at aralin sa kada subjects.

We instantly went to our own car when we arrived at the parking lot. Pinauna na niya ang sasakyan ko pagkatapos ay sumunod na siya.

It was almost two years that have passed. Many had change and many had also stay the same. I needed to move forward dahil kung hindi ay ako rin naman ang mapapag-iwanan. Ako rin naman ang kawawawa.

Kahit sa kada pagsakay at pagmaneho ko ng aking sasakyan ay naalala ko siya. His memories with me feels like only yesterday.

Am I angry with him for leaving me?

Honestly, I'm not. Wala naman akong karapatan magalit. Yes, he said he likes me; however, our relationship remains only as friendship.

Nadurog ako.