Caught In Flames

77 : Endure

ARTEMIS

"He's coming here?" I asked, trying to keep my voice calm when the truth is, the lump in my throat is breaking me. I want to cry, but I can't.

"Yes. I'm sorry if we didn't tell you beforehand." I waved my hand to dismiss Khali's words. Huminga ako ng malalim at pilit na nag-ipon ng lakas sa loob ko.

"Sue, paabot ng phone, please?" She immediately reached for the table beside me when the door suddenly opened and revealed a face I never thought I'd see again.

But this is for my brother. Yes. I have to keep telling myself that.

All of this, for my brother. Endure, Art. Endure.

With his blank eyes and emotionless face, he entered the room without a word and stood there, at the end of my bed. I felt my breath hitch as I reach for the blanket. I feel this urge to cover myself up and get away.

All this time I though I'd be ready, but I'm not. Shit.

"Make it fast." Napatingin ako kay Khali na seryoso ang mukhang nakatingin sa kanya habang nakahalukipkip. Lumipat ang tingin ko kay Sue na nakaupo sa tabi ko at nakahawak sa kamay ko. I held onto it tighter and glanced at him.

But I instantly regretted doing so because I met his gaze almost immediately. Sa pagkakataong iyon ay ang hawak naman ni Sue ang dumiin kaya kahit papaano'y gumaan ang pakiramdam ko.

"He's out." Two words. Dalawang salita na nakapagpatayo sa'kin at inalis ang suwerong nakakabit sa braso ko. I heard them call my name after I left the room but I ignored them and ran down the stairs. Alam kong madali nila akong mahahabol kung gagamit pa ako ng elevator.

Bawat hakbang pababa ng hagdan ay tila inaalog ang utak ko. I can feel the seering pain on the top of my head and my stomach.

Wala na akong pakialam kung may bumuka pang tahi sa mga sugat ko. I have to go see my brother─

"Art, stop!" Biglang may humawak sa braso ko kaya napatigil ako. Napaigik ako dahil may mahapding nahawakan ang humatak sa'kin pero binalewala ko iyon at sinubukang hatakin pabalik ang kamay ko. Pero bago ko pa man mahila ang braso ko ay may humawak naman sa kabila.

"Art, they have a plan. Huwag mong ipahamak ang sarili mo." Humarap ako kay Temper at Trailer at napakagat lang sa labi ko. I tutned around when I felt their grip loosen and hugged them tightly.

Unti-unting tumulo ang luha ko habang mahigpit na nakayakap sa kanilang dalawa. Nakakainis. Gusto kong puntahan si Kuya pero masisira ang plano nila.

I could feel both of their hands tapping my back. Mas lalo lang akong naiyak dahil sa ginagawa nila.

This is what friends do. Atleast, this is what we always do.

Now I feel guilty for forgetting them. All of them were good friends. Until now they still are. Sue, Khali, Temper, Trailer, and Me. We were inseperable. How could I forget them?

Stress, the doctor said. I told that doctor everything that day I remembered everything. She kept quiet. I'll be forever grateful. Hindi ko alam kung sinabi nina Khali ang plano pero nagpapasalamat ako. Ayokong mahusgahan kaagad ng iba ang Kuya ko.

"Shh. Tahan na." I was cut off from my reverie nang magsalita si Trailer. Teka, si Temper ba? Ay! Bahala na!

Mabilis akong lumayo at nagpunas ng luha. Napansin kong nakaakbay si Temper kay Trailer dahil hindi pa din magaling ang binti nito.

"We should go back. Baka naghahanap na sila." I nodded and tried to flash a smile. Pero agad itong nabura nang magsalita ang dalawa.

"Uhog mo natulo!"

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