I am not certain how long, or how far I had wondered. All I knew was I didn't want Yusei to see me this rattled. Nor did I want to see how Yusei might look at me, expecting he would be disgusted that he was friends with someone who dreamt a lot about sex.
All I knew was that when I finally stopped walking, was down by the water front. I sat on the soft green grass, wishing things could go back to normal. Just wishing I could talk to Yusei about things like normal. I wanted nothing more than to talk to Yusei, about anything.
I pulled my legs up to my chest and wrapped my arms them. I felt like I was being torn to pieces. Last time I'd felt such pain I'd become an asshole. Yeah I had always been a jack ass, but not to my friends. It had scared me when I'd snapped at Crow, because I felt like the old me was returning. I couldn't let Yusei see me like that. I had to leave.
"What must he think of me?" I moaned regretfully not bothering to stop the tears I could feel brimming up. We'd been through so much, the three of us. Well the six of us, if you counted the twins and Akiza. The enforcers, the fortune Cup, the dark signers, Goodwin, Iliaster, Z-one. Could some feelings really ruin everything?
I hid my face in my knees, glad Yusei couldn't see this. I just wanted Yusei to be happy. To be the one to give him that happiness and yet it seemed that all I could do was only ruin everything. I began sobbing audibly, unable to hold it back.
So I was reduced to running again, forced to hold myself together, crying, wishing for the past, knowing I couldn't have it. Wishing Yusei confided in me like he did with Crow. But maybe the past meant that it would never happen. It felt like I was losing everything I'd fought so hard to get back. I was being crushed by my own ego. I had never hated myself so much.
"I don't want lose you." I sobbed, thinking of Yusei. I looked up as I heard a duel runner pull up behind me. It was Crow. Just what I needed. He rushed straight toward me, obviously alarmed at the state I'd worked myself into.
"Trust Yusei to be right about you needing to talk." he remarked sitting down next to me, "I think next time I'll hold my tongue."
"Go flap off bird brain." I spat, still mad at him, "Surely those orphans that you look after need your help more than I do."
"I caused this, I need to take responsibility and fix." Crow said, shocking me by claiming he was in the wrong. "Besides if I don't bring you home, I'm pretty sure Yusei will pluck me. I've never seen him so angry."
"Yusei was angry?" I said. Crow nodded. "I'm a fucking idiot!" I yelled punching the grass with all my might. Crow jumped in alarm.
"He wasn't mad at you, he was mad at me." Crow said, "If I didn't know better I'd think he likes you."
"Why was he mad at you?" I asked hoping I could help, wanting make things better.
"Because I pissed you off so much that you ran off. You should have seen him. I think he shouted himself horse." Crow answered. "So what do you need to talk about? And don't give me that crap about it sorting itself out. Judging by the look of you it won't."
"I can't." I said. Next thing I knew I was on the ground holding my nose, Crow standing over me, fist clenched, angry. He had punched me.
"Don't be an ass!" Crow shouted. "Take our help, cause you have us all concerned. Come on, tell me." I shook my head. "If I have to, I will beat it out of you Jack, even if I get beaten up myself later. Why did my comment hit such a sensitive nerve?" I believed Crow was going to hit me.
"Because I haven't told anyone about this stuff. I can't. It would change how you all see me." I answered, scared for the first time in years.
"How bad can it be?" Crow growled. "All us blokes dream about getting sagged by hot girls. I mean come on, it's not like you dreaming about being fucked by a guy."
I couldn't look at Crow, out of shame. I heard a thud. I looked up. Crow had fallen to his knees, shocked.
"You're gay." Crow stated, not asking. He started to laugh. "No wonder I stuck a cord."
"Yeah, go on, laugh it up." I spat once again mad at Crow, getting to my feet, "Take the piss if you have to."
"That's not why I'm laughing, Jack." Crow corrected me. "I'm laughing at my own stupidity. It's so obvious now."
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"That the King of Duels, the master of faster has a crush on Yusei." Crow answered. "I can see why too. It might also explain why you two seem to have a bond that nothing can break."
I felt a hot blush on my face. Was it that obvious. Then dread dropped into my stomach like a lead weight.
"Has Yusei figured it out?" I asked, knowing if Crow could figure it out, then, with his smarts Yusei, probably could.
"No." Crow answered standing up, "I don't think Yusei notices anything like that. He mostly thinks about duelling, heroics, and how to improve our duel runners. Or at least from what we normally talk about. Besides, he has never brought it up."
"You can't tell him. Not a thing." I said relieved.
"Believe me, I would never do that." Crow said with an understanding look on his face. "I can sympathise with you some what. I mean I do swing both ways. I know how confusing it can be."
"Thank you." I said.
"But you need to apologise to Yusei. And the others too." Crow stated, looking uncomfortable.
"Why?" I asked.
"Yusei got so scared when you didn't come back for lunch that he called all the others." Crow answered my question with an uncomfortable smile.
"You mean?" Was all I could say.
"Yep," Crow said, "He called the twins, Mina, Akiza, and Trudge. They are all out looking for you."
I ran for Crow's duel runner, tapping the screen looking for the call option. I first called Yusei because he sounded the most worked up. He answered after the second ring.
"Crow tell me you found..." Yusei cut himself off as he saw my face on the screen as he glanced down.
"Yes Crow found me, Yusei." I answered him, receiving a smile of relief. "We've also patched everything up. We're down by the water front."
"Stay there, we'll be there soon." Yusei said ending the call.
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YuGiOh 5Ds: Accept me, accept us.(Pov of Jack Atlas)
FanfictionJack Atlas, who shares an apartment with his best friends Yusei Fudo and Crow Hogan, has come to a shocking realisation and is torn up internally about what he should do, especially since he doesn't know everything about the situation he is in, and...