WHAT COMES AFTER THE END OF THIS

Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Chase's PoV

She looked extremely pretty today. Her blue eyes like blazing sapphires in the afternoon sun, troubled, yes, broken, definitely and hiding the secrets I wanted to uncover so eagerly, most certainly. I marvelled at the fact that eyes could hold so much power, so much power that when I looked into them for too long I could feel my knees getting weak. But this couldn't be, I couldn't feel anything of the sort towards her. She was my student and that was all she was ever going to be. Nothing more and nothing less. This fact bothered me more than I'd like to admit. The idea of Allison being cold and haughty towards me for the past few months was making me question my decision of choosing to spend the life with her more and more and these newfound feelings for Yrene,of which I was now sure, were making it all the more difficult. I tried to strangulate the feelings inside of me but they refused to die and every time I saw her they awoke with a spark. This had to stop.
~*~
Yrene's PoV

His office was nice and toasty, just like I remembered it to be the last time. Indeed it was toasty enough that there was no need for a blazer. Howsoever, I wasn't going to take mine off, lest it lead to more questions; which by the way I was sure were bound to be asked by Chase.

"Yrene. Look I can understand that it's very difficult for you to talk about it but you have to, okay?" 

I nod and look away,

"Chase, what do you want to know?"

"Everything. But gradually. There's no rush," as if, I almost scoff; it wasn't very long ago that I had been in his office and he had questioned me to no end even then, disregarding the fact that I was not in the mood to talk about anything, " and you can take your time to get comfortable around me first."

He doesn't need to know that I am already too comfortable in his presence, did he? He need not know that I already feel protected every time he is around, I decide. 

"Fine."

"Good. Now carry on."

"Look there's not much to it and I am probably just a little over sensitive. But well, I'll tell you a few things today. But only a few." I add authority to my voice, making it very clear, " I've been bullied my entire life for having had a, for the lack of a better word, 'fat' body, I was continuously told how no boy would ever like me, how ugly I am etcetera etcetera. This, as you can probably judge, started way before I lost all that weight and come down from a size 5 to a size 1 but the problem is people don't really forget so they bring it up when you're down just so you don't get up again. I'm sure you can understand that this is what has been happening, or at least a part of what has been happening."

I pause for a second but he gestures with his hand for me to carry on; and so I do.

"Moving on, at home too there was and still is a pressure to lose weight even more than I already have. People were continually displeased with my body and soon enough I began hating my figure too; this was only the beginning of my clinical depression. Ever since I was six I've had an anxiety disorder because I've been stressing out about grades all my life not to mention the pressure at home to attain the best possible results no matter how; anything below A*'s means nothing to my parents. All of this resulted in me getting severe anxiety attacks before anything big for example an exam or to be honest anything at all and my hatred for the way I looked has also added to it. I'm also an insomniac and sometimes have to sneak in anti allergy pills and painkillers only to help me sleep as my family thinks I have overcome the disorder due to the previously prescribed medicines; but I have not, I just pretend like I have; no one wants a mentally unwell person being associated with them, especially my parents" At that note, I take a deep breath at the end to indicate I am done and that this was all I was going to tell him. Today. I couldn't carry on. I couldn't tell him about all my other family problems and all the other things yet. I wasn't sure how I was going to later on, either, but I didn't want to think about it; not now at least.