Broken

Chapter 79 - Birthday

Carly's P.O.V

I just sit by the window thinking how Natalie killed herself. Was she planning this all along? Why would she do this? Why couldn't she just stay strong? Why couldn't she just understand that she had people that loved her? Every question kept replaying in my head.

But of course, none of them would ever be answered.

I miss Natalie more then ever. I miss everything about her and it's so hard to let go of her because I don't wanna Believe she's gone.

I just remember telling Cameron about Natalie's death. He was full of sadness and had just collapsed in my arms in tears. I held him trying to tell him to breath, but I was having trouble myself.

"Carly you have to talk to me," Nash says as he enters the room.

I probably should talk to him, but I can't find my voice. "Babe, come on. It's our daughters birthday, we all need you there. I know this is hard on you, but it's hard on a lot of us right now...We can't live without you speaking...I can't live without you speaking. I need to here your soft, amazing voice." I had a feeling he was about to cry.

I looked out the window fighting my tears, I was trying to get my voice out, I was fighting! I needed to speak!

"Carly your Natalie's mom, and she knows your gone. I can see it in the look of her eyes. She hasn't slept well this past month she needs you Carly! Please speak to me! It's her first birthday! Look, I know she's gone, okay? I get it. My best friend and my girlfriend aren't speaking I-" before he could say anything more I jumped in his arms.

This was a way of speaking to him, It's the only thing I could do right now. I just held on to him tight like we were about to fall off a cliff and he was the only thing keeping me steady.

"I love you," I cried out, resting my head on his shoulder.

"I love you too."

We both just hold each other for awhile until I finally found my words, "So let's go see our daughter."

Taking Nash's hand, I follow him out the door. Before we left, I took one last look at the apartment because I know it will probably be the last time I see it. It's full of bad memories and it's time to move on with my life.

---

Getting home, I walk threw the door and find everyone at the house, From Taylor to Aaron and mahogany to Shawn.

"Hi guys," they all smile at me and just say they're sorry.

"Carly, I love you girly. I'm glad to see your back," mahogany whispered in my ear.

As I Smiling at her, I find the two people that I owe a hug too. I hug hayes tight probably making him unable to breath, "I'm sorry buddy."

"It's okay carly" I kiss his cheek and move to the next person.

"Cam," I say with and tears streaming down my face,

He grabs me and we rock back and fourth crying together," it's time to move on cam, we just have to." I whisper.

"I know, we can so this."

He squeezes me right like he was trying to put my broken pieces back together, of course only Nash could do that with his strong hugs.

I let go of Cameron and move my way down to Liz. In her arms was a beautiful one year old girl with bright blue eyes and a smile that lite up once she saw saw me. "Hi baby girl."

I grabbed Natalie and kissed her cheek," Mommy is so sorry baby girl, Im never leaving you again," I cried.

While holding her, I fixed her puffy pink dress and straighten out her head band. I felt somebody's arms wrap around the both of us. Looking up I find Nash smiling. It was good to finally have a family again cause I know Natalie's gone but my life is gonna keep going even if hers stopped. I didn't know that a few hours ago, I thought that it wouldn't be fair for me to have a life since hers just went to waste.

But I have people who need me in my life and I can't just give up on them. It's not fair to them and Natalie would probably be upset with me if I did.

Now I can only hold on to the memories that I hold of the two of us because those will never go away.

And now I know I'm not broken anymore, I just became bent and I'll work on being fixed.

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A/N

Sorry for the horrible editing! And we're so sorry we took like 2 months to update!!! We've just been really busy!

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{Just wanted to give a huge shoutout to anotherrdreamer   For the AMAZING and beautiful cover!!!!!!!!! Thanks again! :)}