His Ruthless Revenge (A Dark Bully Romance)

Chapter Twenty Nine

Present day...

"Are you sure you're ok?" Eric asks me; a look of concern on his face as he joins me at the kitchen table.
"Eric, you've got to stop asking me if I'm alright." I sigh irritably. "I promise you every day that I'm fine."
"I'm just worried about you. You haven't been the same these last few months and I thought there might have been some slight improvement by now."
"Can you blame me?" I challenge him, losing my patience. "After everything that's happened to me?"
"Of course not." He assures me. "I'm just concerned."
"I'm ok. I mean... I will be." I conclude firmly, trying to convince myself as well as Eric.
"I can always call my mum and tell her not to come over later." He offers kindly, reaching for his phone.
"Don't be silly, I'm looking forward to seeing her." I assure him, finishing the last of my coffee before placing the empty mug in the sink.
"I just feel bad about inviting her when I know how much you want to see your own mum." He explains sensitively.
"I'll be able to... eventually."
"When?" Eric persists, refusing to let it go.
"When Chase stops looking for me." I snap abruptly, raking my fingers through my hair.
"April, it's been several months since you left him. He should have moved on by now.
"He's determined and won't give up." I remind him. "But he won't find me."
"The fact that you can't even meet up with your own mum in case he follows her makes me feel sick." Eric complains, shaking his head in disgust.
"It won't be like this forever. I really need you to help me stay positive, Eric."
"I'm sorry." He apologises sincerely, taking my hand in his. "Only positive thinking from now on."

Eric has to go into work shortly after our discussion and leaves me alone for a few hours. I always find the start of the day to be the easiest but can't help dreading how difficult it will feel by the time I reach the end of it again.
These are the times when I really struggle and find it so hard to distract myself. It's like I can't switch my mind off from its incessant thinking and it leaves me feeling incredibly drained and exhausted.

I've been living with Eric since I left Chase several months ago and he's been such a great friend to me.
His fiancé has treated me so kindly as well, making sure I never feel awkward or uncomfortable and trusting my friendship with Eric from the very beginning. The three of us have become really close and I'll never be able to repay their kindness or generosity.

The fact that Eric's mum is visiting later on is also making me feel nervous. I know she might have news about Chase and as much as I don't want to ask her, I need to know.

I just have to.

I have to know if Louise had the baby yet and I need to know if Chase is still searching for me. I've no idea how I'm going to feel or how I'm going to react once I find out these things but will deal with the aftermath later.

I take a bath as soon as Eric leaves, submerging myself beneath the water as I reminisce about my time here and how much longer I'll have to stay in hiding.
I know I should have taken some steps to find my own place by now or at least try to create some sort of life for myself but something is still holding me back.

Chase.

I shake my head, desperate to get him out of my mind and move on from everything. I truly thought I'd be able to put our relationship behind me once I left but the complete opposite has happened.

I can't stop thinking about him.

I've even thought about seeking out some type of therapy. I'm willing to try anything to move on from him and the inexplicable hold he still has over me at this point.

Eric's mum arrives a few hours later. He went to pick her up from the station and I can hear them talking in the back garden once they're back.
I give them a few minutes to themselves before going downstairs to greet her properly.
Taking a deep breath before entering the garden, I plaster a warm smile on my face and say hello. "April, it's so lovely to see you. How are you?!" She greets me happily, holding her arms out for a hug. "You look well!"
"I'm not sure about that." I joke, smiling weakly. "How are you doing?"
"I'm doing well." She replies excitedly. "I'm just so pleased to be here and catch up with you both."
"How's my mum? Did you tell her you were seeing me today?" I demand eagerly, struggling to restrain myself from asking too many questions.
"I'll tell her tomorrow." She replies softly. "I thought it might be too difficult for her if she knew I was coming beforehand."
"I understand." I murmur softly, lowering my gaze. "She's so desperate to come herself."
"But you still think it's too risky?" She questions me, squeezing my hand gently.
"Absolutely. Chase knows how close I am to my mum which means he'll be watching her every move." I explain earnestly, taking a seat in one of the summer chairs next to hers.
"Shall I go and get us some drinks?" Eric offers, eager to change the subject as he heads inside and leaves us alone.
"You seem anxious." I observe, noticing how on edge she appears. "What is it?"
"Look, Eric really doesn't think I should tell you this but I think you have a right to know." She says quietly, keeping an eye on the back door so he can't hear us.
"What is it?"
"Louise had the baby." She reveals gently, watching me closely.
"When?" I demand sharply, my heart beating rapidly.
"Last week." She confirms quietly, placing her hand on top of mine.
"Wow." I sigh defeatedly, exhaling slowly. "I knew it was inevitable but it's still a shock. Does that make any sense?"
"Of course it does." She assures me kindly. "Because it makes it all real now."
"I probably shouldn't ask but... what did she have?" I inquire timidly, chastising myself for even caring about that at all.
"Are you sure you want to know? Won't that make it even harder for you?"
"Just tell me. Please." I urge her, awaiting her response with baited breath.
"She had a boy." She divulges carefully, giving me the space I need to digest the news.
"Chase always wanted a son." I whisper faintly, my eyes filling with unshed tears. "I just never expected him to have one with someone else."
"I'm so sorry." She apologises, pulling her chair closer to mine. "I shouldn't have said anything in the first place."
"No, I'm glad you did. Thank you."
"Everything ok?" Eric interjects suddenly, startling us both.
"Everything's fine." I reply evasively. "I'm just going to pop upstairs for a second but I'll be down in a minute."

I walk away before my tears start to fall, threatening to overspill as I hurry inside and upstairs to my bedroom. I drop the facade as soon as I close my door, collapsing on the bed as I begin to sob silently.
I can hardly breathe as I bury my face in the pillow, desperate for my complete and utter breakdown to remain private.
I'm consumed by the sudden urge to destroy something, needing to expel my fury and rid myself of the insurmountable rage that's bubbling beneath the surface.
I consider it for a brief moment, debating if destroying the contents of my bedroom might actually help. I quickly realise that it won't and start to question if I'm really starting to lose my mind.

I stay upstairs for a while longer, staring up at the ceiling as I contemplate what I'm going to do next and the major decisions I now have to make. Something has to change and I'm pretty sure there's someone who can help me. I reach for my phone by my bed, pausing for a couple of seconds before dialling his number.
"Hello?" Finn answers, sounding breathless.
"It's me." I disclose quietly, awaiting his reply.
"It's so good to hear from you." He sighs deeply. "I've missed you."
"I've missed you too." I tell him. "Why are you so out of breath?"
"I was just finishing a workout." He chuckles.
"That's a pretty nice image." I reply flirtatiously, hoping it didn't sound too desperate.
"Are you flirting with me?" He teases, enjoying my embarrassment.
"I actually called to ask you something." I reply quickly, eager to change the subject.
"Is something wrong?" He asks. "You sound upset."
"I'm fine." I assure him, wanting to sound convincing. "I actually called to see if you're free this Friday?"
"Are you serious?" He asks, failing to conceal his astonishment. "I've been asking you to go out with me for months and you always say no."
"I said I needed some time." I correct him, hoping I haven't left it too late and missed my chance.
"But you think you're ready now?"
"I think I am." I admit hesitantly.
"You don't sound too sure."
"I need to move on from everything that happened with Chase. I need to move forward with my life and that means being open to taking new chances every now and then."
"You already know how I feel about you, April. My feelings haven't changed."
"So I'll see you on Friday night then? I'll text you Eric's address which is where I'm still staying."
"There's something I need to tell you before we meet up." Finn blurts out, taking me by surprise.
"What is it?" I ask, holding my breath.
"I'm not working at the gym anymore." He reveals solemnly.
"You're not?"
"I quit shortly after you left Chase."
"But why? You'd only just started and you loved that job."
"April, do you really think I could still work with Chase after everything that happened?"
"Did he hurt you?" I demand, struggling to keep the anger out of my voice.
"We both know he would have done. He's a psychopath."
"So what did you do?"
"A few of my work colleagues told me he was looking for me. They said he was out of his mind, ranting about how he was going to kill me when he got his hands on me."
"Finn, I'm so sorry." I apologise tearfully. "I had no idea."
"You knew he wasn't going to forget what we did to him."
"So where are you now? Where are you working?"
"I'm actually just a few miles away from you. I started working at a new place a few months back."
"How come you never told me?"
"I didn't want to freak you out. I didn't want you to think I'd followed you and turned into some possessive stalker like your ex."
"I'd never think that about you." I tell him truthfully.
"Does... this mean you still want to meet up on Friday?" He prompts me, his voice a little uncertain.
I pause for a few seconds, realising how monumental my decision is. It's now a choice between living in the past and taking a giant leap into the unknown.
"Of course I do." I encourage him. "It's about time I start living again."
"That's great, April. I really hope I get to be a part of that."
"Me too." I reply honestly, praying it all works out.

I hang up the phone and crawl underneath my covers. It feels safe under here and I have no intention of coming out anytime soon. Chase has finally moved on and I've got to do the same.

I just have to.

He has his child and a brand new life now. It's time I put the past behind me and start getting on with whatever future I might have. I'm not sure if this will include Finn but I'm willing to at least try. Going out with him will be the first step to putting Chase behind me which is where he belongs.

A future without Chase is still inconceivable but I know there's no going back now. There's no alternate universe out there where Chase and I are still together or a probability that we ever will be.

You can do this. I tell myself, willing myself to believe it.

I don't have any other choice.