Hugs & Blows

Thinking thoughts.

Ethan is sitting in his trailer, he felt as if he is lost and drowning at sea, he was stressed and overwhelmingly in love with Odette. Lovely thoughts of Odette were the only glue keeping him together currently. He slowly took deep breaths and focused on her. Odette with her candy gloss coated cherry red fruit punch flavored lips, and the bitter taste of coffee and cigarettes. The way she always smelled like cheap bar soap and overpriced hair products.

Her illfitting clothing that she adored. He remembers someone describing her as "one of those girls who appears as if she has no idea how she'll ever be able to afford her next pack of cowboy killing cancer sticks, yet types on her pretentious macbook while sipping far too expensive free trade lattes." Ethan laughed at the time. He chuckles now, because that was a fair assessment of Odette, even though she's so much more than that.

Ethan thinks that most people think that Odette's entire being is comprised of eyeliner and cigarettes, and if he's honest her eyeliners and cigarettes probably weigh more than she actually does. Her eye makeup rarely looks the same, it's often brown and subtle with sparkly eye shadow and filled in brown brows, or it's dark and heavy kohl with upturned edges. All sultry sex appeal. Ethan finds himself hardening, and he decides to relax in a different way.

Odette is watching a movie, and she really wants dark black extensions and a black hair ribbon, she wants to tease it up in a trashy beehive and tie a ribbon around it and behave in a odd fashion. She isn't sure why she does this, decides to randomly change everything about her appearance, she thinks it's an identity crisis thing, or a selfhatred thing. She doesn't know and she doesn't even really care. She knows she's not doing it anyway.

"Surely he'll break my heart before I break his." The girl in the movie she was half watching said that. Odette thinks that's true for her and Ethan as well, but then she wonders.

Odette has always been one half of a pair, with Betsy, Anthony, and now with Ethan. She thinks about leaving Ethan and running off to Seattle to find out who she really is, but she finds herself unable to breathe. She doesn't think she will exist without Ethan, and that frightens her. So she does what she always does when she's scared. She calls Ethan so that they can confess their love to each other. They end up having a wicked bit of phone sex, and afterwards Odette tries again to write him a poem.