tequila ; s. paulson one - shots

bad habits (c. goode)

・ everyone had their share of bad habits.

・ ever since childhood, you had always cracked your knuckles, until it developed into an involuntary habit.

・ in addition to that, you found it very hard to sit still, movement was absolutely necessary to maintain your sanity.

・ cordelia had been drawn to you the moment you stepped into the school, and that didn't change at all, she still was enamored by you.

・ she never told you off for fidgeting, only when it was a disturbance to others did she ask you, very nicely, to try playing with something less audible.

・ you were very grateful that after years of trying to suppress all your energy, nobody was telling you to 'keep still'.

・ delia had always been attentive to your body language, from the way you would play with the rings on your fingers, to the way your leg would bounce up and down, and to the way you bit the inside of your cheek.

・ when you seemed more energetic than usual, she would pass you an origami book and papers, knowing you well enough to know that making something helped focus your energy.

・ you loved her dearly, and were very grateful for everything she had done for you, so you tried to pay attention to the non verbal signals she was sending out.

・ soon you noticed that she would routinely skip meals to keep working in her office.

・ at first when you questioned her about it, she denied it and said she wasn't hungry.

・ you then tried to convince her to eat with you and the girls, she shut down your efforts yet again, snapping that she was busy and needed to work.

・ that was the first night after you started dating that you slept in your own room.

・ the next day, she passed you the origami book again, with an apology, which you accepted happily.

・ you then tried a different approach, slipping a lunch box into her office everyday, with a small origami figure and note.

・ cordelia noticed your efforts and made sure to eat the food you prepared, thanking you when she kissed you good night.

・ wanting to repay you, she started looking for new ways to focus your attention on something productive.

・ soon, you were knitting and practicing typography, implementing those in the small tokens you left in delia's lunch box.

・ when you noticed her working late, you would sneak into her office and give her a hug before asking her to sleep with you.

・ every time she refused, you would make sure she slept in, completing the 8 hours she needed.

・ on those days, she'd wake up to hot coffee on the nightstand, and a small note telling her how much you loved her.

・ she would look for you and kiss your forehead after getting ready, showing you her gratitude.

・ sometimes she'd ask you about some cuts on your hands, and you would deflect, saying it was an accident.

・ (which wasn't entirely a lie, because you had no idea where they came from.)

・ she would catch you peeling the scabs off the cuts, and the two of you would spend time in her office treating them.

・ you both knew better than to directly tell each other off for things, because inside, there was that knowledge that it was wrong and all you needed was someone to take care of you.

・ the two of you would go out for picnics every once in a while, and you would talk about everything.

・ she'd tell you about a new craft book she had found, suggesting that you try it.

・ you would ask her what she thought of your cooking, and if she liked the gifts you'd leave.

・ she'd ask how your wounds were healing, or if you felt them itching again.

・ you would then show her your band-aids, allowing her to touch them with her ever-so-gentle caresses that said more than words ever could.

・ after some silence, you'd ask her how she slept, and she'd always answer the same, 'better when i'm with you,' and you'd both grin at her cheesiness.

・ and in that moment, both of you knew that everyone did have their share of bad habits, but you had finally found your cure.

wc : 704